It’s hard not be excited about this weekend’s clash between LSU and Alabama in Tuscaloosa.

College Gameday’s excited. CBS is excited. The SEC is excited. The 100,000 fans who are going to be there are excited, plus the thousands who are going to be tailgating. The College Football Play-Off Committee – who voted LSU No.2 and Alabama as No3 – is excited.

Oh, and Donald Trump’s excited. He just loves college football, man, he’s not there for political capital or anything.

This is going to be a showdown of offenses. Both are sizzling right now. Joe Burrow and Tua Tagovailoa have got their offenses on afterburn, helped by explosive future NFL wide receivers on both sides. The defenses? Both have looked a little porous, although with Alabama it’s been the ‘bend but don’t break style’, while LSU’s gone for the Big XII-style “Shoot, we’ll just outscore ’em” style.

To give the stats, LSU has the 4th-best offense in the nation, averaging a tidy 46.8 points per game. Alabama has had 48.6 points per game (ranking second). Alabama has given up 122 points to LSU’s 160, and a lot of people will point that a vast majority of Alabama’s points-concessions happened during junk time when the Tide were already gazillions of points in front.

LSU has faced by far and away the better teams, with a trip to then-Top 10 team Texas followed by monster home games against Florida and Auburn. Alabama can point to winning at Kyle Field, and, er, battles against South Carolina and Tennessee.

Joe Burrow has been talked about as the nation’s leading Heisman contender, throwing for 2,805 yards and 30 TDs this season. He’s been helped by a spread offense that’s finally using some of the best athletes in the land – a stretch away from the previous historical incompetencies that made Jarvis Landry and Odell Beckham Jr almost sideshows a few years ago. His weapons – Justin Jefferson (819 yards, 9 TDs) and Ja’Mar Chase (749 yards, 9 TDs) have both been deadly, but Terrance Marshall (333 yards, 7 TDs) and Thaddeus Moss have also contributed heavily. Oh, and RB Clyde Edwards-Helaire (808 yards, 8 TDs) can fly too.

But all the talk is the injury to Tua, who has banked 2,166 yards and 27 TDs so far this season. The QB injured his ankle against Tennessee and consequently needed ankle surgery. We don’t know what his progress is, but Nick Saban has said he will be a game-time decision. Since Saban isn’t going to tell anyone whether his future NFL first-rounder is OK or not before the biggest clash of the year, we won’t know until he steps on that field.

The biggest problem for LSU, though, is their defense. The last time a team with a semi-competent offense came along, they conceded 28 points and 457 yards (Florida). Before that all was the talk about Joe Burrow’s monster game at Texas (he passed for 471 yards), but people seem to forget that Sam Ehlinger threw on LSU’s ‘vaunted’ secondary for 407. If LSU’s ‘D’ plays as badly as they did in those two games, they are a world of trouble. It’s not going to be helped by the fact that future first rounder Grant Delpit is back, but probably he won’t be 100%. Derek Stingley Jr, one of the best freshman CBs in the nation, is also questionable. If they aren’t 100%, how on earth will they stop Jeremy Jeudy (682 yards, 8 TDs), Henry Ruggs (588 yards, 7 TDs), and Devonta Smith (721 yards, 9 TDs)?

If Tua is hurt, then it’s advantage LSU for sure. Of course, Najee Harris and Brian Robinson will smash the ball down the throat of LSU, hoping to shorten the game and control the ball, helped by the fact that LSU’s starting LB Michael Divinity has left the team for reasons unknown.

PREDICTION: If Tua is healthy, Alabama will win by 10, if not LSU wins by 7.

And the rest?

2) Missouri at No.6 Georgia (-10 1/2) : The Bulldogs jumped back into the National Conversation after beating Florida at the Cocktail Party, while Missouri has gone completely the wrong way after incompetent losses to Vanderbilt and Kentucky. Frankly, we’re surprised that the line’s not higher in Georgia’s favour. If Missouri gets housed this weekend, there will be a ton of pressure on Barry Odom. PREDICTION: Georgia by 17.

3) Vanderbilt at No.10 Florida (-28): Florida wasn’t great against Georgia, and still managed to keep it tight against Georgia. All eyes will be on Florida DC Todd Grantham not to screw it up on third down like he did against Georgia….although against Vanderbilt, this will be far worse opposition. PREDICTION: Florida by 31.

4) App State at South Carolina (-5 1/2): The Gamecocks weren’t impressed against Vanderbilt, but it was never close. Applachian State’s offense has enough to cause anyone problems (they are 13th in the nation in scoring), so this should be more fun than most people think it might be. PREDICTION: South Carolina by 10.

5) Western Kentucky at Arkansas (-1): This is how terrible Arkansas is. They are a 1-point favorite against an offense that is ranked 108th in the country. Sure, their defense is horrible, but how bad can it get? PREDICTION: Arkansas by 10. 

6) New Mexico at Ole Miss (-31): Yawn. PREDICTION: Ole Miss by 42.

The day we’ve all been waiting for is coming on Thursday.

No, it’s not Armageddon our chance to be taken up to heaven. No, it’s not that time that we get the call from Heidi Klum offering to meet her for a date.

It’s better than that. It’s the first release of the College Football Play-Off Committee’s 1-2-3-4.

This Tuesday the Committee rated their 1 to 4 as Ohio State, LSU, Alabama and Penn State. Clemson was 5th, Georgia 6th, followed by Oregon, Utah, Oklahoma and Florida.

In other words, the SEC owned the Top 10.

But if Georgia wins out, this could create a monstrous nightmare for the Committee.

THE IDEAL SCENARIO: Alabama beats LSU comfortably/ LSU beats Alabama comfortably, win rest of games, win SEC title against Georgia.

This means that there will be no argument about having two SEC teams in the College Football Play-Off. Georgia gets its second loss after the South Carolina debacle, and it’s out of the reckoning. One of Alabama and LSU don’t make the play-off either, because they got their asses handed to them and to boot, don’t win their division.

THE LESS-THAN-IDEAL BUT OK SCENARIO: Alabama beats LSU by 3/ LSU beats Alabama by 3, win rest of games, wins SEC title against Georgia. 

The loss by LSU/Alabama isn’t too bad, but the winner’s gone on to win the SEC, so that’s it. Sure, there’s a question mark about whether LSU and Alabama should stay in the College Football reckoning, but Georgia still get its second loss after the South Carolina debacle, so they can relax a bit and leave it to the Weird Guys With The Jackets to fight over the Bulldogs’ presence in a New Year’s Six/ Jan 1 bowl.

THE NIGHTMARE SCENARIO: Alabama beats LSU by 3/ LSU beats Alabama by 3. Georgia runs the table meets the winner of the LSU and Alabama game in Atlanta and beats them. 

This is a horror show for the Committee. If Alabama beats LSU or vice-versa by a tiny margin, then dropping them below 4 seems silly. After all, they lost to the 1st or 2nd-ranked team in the nation. If LSU loses closely, it’s because they were beaten-up on defense and they are on the road. A close loss actually makes them look pretty good. If Alabama loses, it’s because they had a back-up quarterback. They should be in the play-off, because Tua’s going to be back and they’ve passed an eye test.

And then comes Georgia. Georgia will have two excellent wins against Auburn and Florida, who will both be ranked in the Top 10-15, which is excellent for the resume. A win over LSU or Alabama game would – for the Bulldogs – vault them into the Committee’s eyes into the Top 4. After all, they’d just win the SEC. But here’s the horrific problem: The SEC will have to choose. They aren’t going to choose three teams to go to the College Football Play-Off. And all three teams would have one loss.

The College Football Play-Off Committee aren’t going to leave out the winner of the SEC, but also wouldn’t want to not include the winner of the GAME TO END THEM ALL (2019 version), either. And the loser can’t have done that badly, with an 11-1 season and only losing to the No.1 or No.2 team in the nation. So what in the hell do they do?

And for Georgia fans, it might all come down to that awful day in Athens. 

We admit it. We followed the bandwagon and predicted that Florida would beat Georgia at the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.

After all, Florida was bringing back two of its biggest defensive guns in Zuniga and Grennard. Georgia had been uninventive. Todd Grantham was incredible. Dan Mullen was on the rise, while Kirby was going to the other way. Hell, a former Florida cheerleader yelled at me for having the nerve to tell her that I thought Georgia had a chance. “We’re going to Atlanta!”, she said. And then stomped off when I suggested that Aaron Hernandez was perhaps not The Swamp’s greatest alum.

So with her in mind I laughed my butt off when my prediction went wrong and Georgia came through with the seven-point victory. Grennard himself admitted that he sucked. Georgia actually mixed the pass and run nicely for a change – and returned kicks. Todd Grantham couldn’t work out how to stop the Bulldogs converting on 3rd down, and Kirby Smart looked a far better coach than Dan Mullen.

So if I ever bump into that Florida cheerleader’s again, my first word will be ‘peace’, to save the chance of me producing children.

In other tales, Mississippi State hammered Arkansas, Auburn’s defense once again won a game for Gus Malzahn, Vanderbilt returned to normal at South Carolina, and Tennessee kept the momentum up by hammering UAB.

So here are the rankings:

1. LSU (8-0): The Tigers were idle, and outdrank Bye Week 140,000 – 10.
2. Alabama (8-0): ‘WE DISRESPECTED BYE WEEK, BUT WE GOT THROUGH IT. WE’VE GOT TO FOCUS!” – Nick Saban. Probably.
3. Georgia (7-1): The SEC East is theirs now. And there’s still the chance of a College Football Play-Off. A win against Auburn will certainly help the resume.
4. Florida (7-2): They aren’t going to Atlanta. Or the College Football Play-Off. But they could win out and finish in a New Year’s Six Bowl.
5. Auburn (7-2): The fanbase hates Gus Malzahn for the inept offense and they are right. They weren’t bad at putting yards up against Ole Miss (507), but won barely. The fact that Bo Nix went 30-44 and the TV guys were saying that it was his best-ever performance in an Auburn shirt was certainly dampening with faint praise. The defense is unreal, though. I feel sorry for Kevin Steele, who must say to his defensive unit: “Sorry guys, but you’re going back out there in a few plays time. Time to rescue the team again.”
6. Texas A&M (6-3): The Aggies were horrible in the first half against UTSA, but got going. Still, the first half was utterly painful. But remember folks: THIS IS THE BEST THREE-LOSS TEAM IN COLLEGE FOOTBALL (maybe). Oh, and A&M is bowl-eligible now, which means that they have gotten bowl eligibility before ‘them people from Austin’.
7. Kentucky (4-4): Got wasted on bourbon with Bye Week and talked some basketball.
8. Tennessee (4-5): Tennessee’s got momentum. After reeling off their third straight victory, there’s a real chance the Vols could get bowl-eligible – and win their next three games (Kentucky, Missouri, Vanderbilt).
9. South Carolina (4-5): The Gamecocks beat Vanderbilt and the fans are a little happier now in Gamecock country. Still, getting to bowl eligibility will mean winning two out of App State, Texas A&M and Clemson. That will be hard work for Muschamp’s team, who could end the season having beaten Georgia but not appearing in January.
10. Missouri (5-3): It was a tight game against Bye Week that Barry Odom nearly lost, but scraped through with a tie. Need one win out of Arkansas, Florida, Tennessee and Georgia to get bowl-eligible, and it ain’t gonna be against Georgia or Florida. The question around Columbia about whether Barry Odom survives (again) might be if the team goes 2-2. Or even 3-1.
11. Ole Miss (3-6): Did a lot of bending but not breaking against Auburn, but just came short. Plumlee’s a fun quarterback to watch, yo. Won’t get to bowl eligibility, but will probably win two out of the next three (New Mexico State, LSU, Mississippi State). Will Matt Luke survive? Maybe.
12. Mississippi State (4-5): The Cowbellers put up SIX HUNDRED AND FORTY YARDS in a 54-24 thrashing of Bye Week (sorry, Arkansas). Kylin Hill ran for TWO HUNDRED AND THIRTY-FOUR YARDS, which is sensational by anyone’s standards. If there’s a ship to right, that’s the way to do it.
13. Vanderbilt (2-6): The momentum has dropped away for the cleverest school in the SEC. Quite rightly, the fanbase should be back calling for Derek Mason’s head – particularly if they don’t win another SEC game (which is totally possible, bearing in mind they’ve got Florida, Kentucky and Tennessee).
14. Arkansas (2-7): If you’re not going to fire Chad Morris, Arkansas, then fire John Chavis. NOW. The Razorbacks managed to give up 640 yards to one of the more inept offenses in the SEC. And 47 points to that offense (they gave up a pick-six). The fans are taking some heart from the younger players, but it’s obvious no-one wants to play for the team right now, who need a win over Western Kentucky to avoid having the joint-worst record in school history….with 2018.

Game 7 of the World Series is drama enough. There are the ups, downs, shocks, disappointments and celebrations.

You know, like Auburn’s season…..every year.

Well, this year the drama increased when it was announced that freshman quarterback Joey Gatewood has left the team.

He said in a Twitter update: “Throughout this process I have experienced highs and lows, trials and tribulations.” He added that he had been committed to the program since 2015, but added: “It is in the best interest of my family that I move forward”.

Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn said: “I really appreciated Joey. When you think about it, when he didn’t win the job earlier, he chose to stick around. Most quarterbacks this day and time wouldn’t do that. He’s just at a point now where he wants to be a starting quarterback and just feels he needs to start looking for schools now so he can find the right spot, and I respect that. He’s a fine young man, and I really appreciate everything Joey has done for our program. Everyone in our program will be rooting for him moving forward.”

A lot of blame has been put on Gus Malzahn for this, because he used Gatewood sparingly while putting faith in fellow freshman Box Nix, who struggled pretty much throughout the season. Both players shone in the Spring, making it very difficult for Malzahn to make the decision – unlike a lot of SEC coaches. Gatewood had been a threat for the Tigers as a running QB, rushing for 148 yards and three touchdowns.

Inexplicably, Malzahn did not give a chance to Gatewood at LSU even with the struggles of Nix, who was terrible in Death Valley, going for 15-35 for just 157 yards, a TD and an INT. And this was against a LSU secondary that really wasn’t that great going into the game. LSU must have been the straw that broke the camel’s back for Gatewood, seeing that Malzahn wasn’t going to put him in despite the horror on the field. He knew then, and there, that it wasn’t to be.

People are thinking that the ideal landing spot for a dual-threat quarterback will be somewhere like Oklahoma, where Lincoln Riley seems to have no problem bring in dual-threat quarterbacks.

Gatewood – the No.1 QB in Florida at the time – was heavily recruited by Alabama, Clemson, Ohio State, Florida State, Mississippi State and Tennessee, and had a total of 35 offers.

In short, he’s going to be one of college football’s hottest commodities come the opening of the transfer portal.

Twitter’s great in the morning. You can catch up with the daily highlights, wonder why people wake up and immediately write about hating or loving things about Donald Trump (DRINK SOME COFFEE PEOPLE!), as well as the usual prayer requests, sniping between Georgia and Florida fans, SEC rankings, excited-about-the-future Vols pictures (CUE HALF-NAKED MAN IN ORANGE AND WHITE OVERALLS)…..and a number of Mississippi State fans already asking for the head of Joe Moorhead.

After all, the Bulldogs have lost four straight, including a stunning loss on the road to Tennessee and blowouts by Auburn and LSU.

It’s been miserable.

This season, we’ve seen the Cowbells that were so loud last year have gone very, very quiet.

It’s gotten so bad that a hater’s created a ‘Fire Jo Moorhead’ page – even creating T-Shirts (Ironically, they are also advertising pro-Mississippi State gear, too (just in case you didn’t think it was an anti-Cowbell vendetta).

Look, we know it was going to be a step-down from last year. A school like Alabama can lose three defensive players to the first round of the NFL Draft and not blink, but Mississippi State (like a lot of other schools), can’t. So when Jeffrey Simmons, Montez Sweat and Jonathan Abram – went off to get paid, it left a huge hole. After all, this was one of the Top 5 defenses in the nation last year.

Also, it was going to be a step-down because the school’s talisman, Nick Fitzgerald, left, and Aeris Williams, who was in a more-than-capable duo with Kylin Hill, took someone’s advice and went off to seek NFL gold (he’s hasn’t been picked up since a failed trial with the Indianapolis Colts, since you ask).

But this isn’t a step-down, this is a tumble.

THE OFFENSE HAS BEEN PUTRID

Quarterbacks-wise, it’s been miserable. Keontay Thompson, who was meant to be Fitzgerald’s successor, was injured, then put himself in the transfer portal, but has not played a snap yet this season. Tommy Stevens, who played in Joe Moorhead’s system at Penn State, has also been injured, leaving freshman Garrett Shrader to pick up everyone else’s problems.

The Mississippi State offensive line was meant to be good. It had the experience.

But good? It’s been a horror show. The line has given up 22 sacks so far this season – the worst in the SEC and 106th in the nation. It’s therefore no surprise that Shrader currently stands 11th in the SEC in pass completion percentage (55.1) and 13th in passing yards (1,022)….he was running for his life.

The offensive line hasn’t helped Kylin Hill, who’s been gutsy. Last week against A&M he had his best running outing for the season (about 150 yards), but he hasn’t had anyone backing him up. It’s meant that while he leads the conference in rushing attempts (793), he’s only 13th in rushing yards per attempt (5.1).

I for one will be stunned if O-Line coach Marcus Johnson is not fired at season-end.

DEFENSE HAS DROPPED LIKE A STONE

The defense has been atrocious. It only leads Vanderbilt and Arkansas in points given up (31 points per game), gives up an average of 6.4 yards per game (second-worst in the SEC), and is equally below-par against pass and run. Again, we’re not surprised given the talent that’s been lost, but still…

THE PROBLEMS ARE BOTH INHERITED AND NOT 

Although Mississippi State fans might want Moorhead out, there is one bear in the room – the NCAA. In late August the World’s Worst Governing Body Except FIFA handed down sanctions to the team after a tutor was found to have helped 10 football ‘student athletes’ in completing general chemistry assignments. All of them have been hit with eight-game suspensions, which has battered the team’s depth, and led to uncertainty as to whom is going to start one weekend to next.

Now, we don’t know if the NCAA sanctions were a result of Moorhead’s efforts to ‘get his players eligible’, but we can presume that a complete lack of oversight from Moorhead and the rest of the Athletic Department will have helped to scupper the season.

ON THE RECRUITING SIDE?

Recruiting-wise, Mississippi State isn’t Alabama, Georgia or LSU, but it’s fine. It’s ranked 8th in the SEC so far (up from 11th), and so far he’s gotten some strong jucos and a speedy quarterback – something he relishes.

SO WHAT WILL HAPPEN?

Mississippi State AD John Cohen has repeatedly denied the fact that Moorhead’s being recruited by college football’s biggest laughing stock, Rutgers. You can see why the rumors have taken place. Moorhead was a former head coach at Fordham in New York, and then was the offensive coordinator at Penn State. A move to the North-East, people surmise, might be a good move.

But will Moorhead move or be moved? We don’t think so. He’s got more of a long-term plan in place.

Give him time, Mississippi State fans. Remember, y’all gave Buddy Croom 5 years.

Even more annoying than Gary Danielson’s voice, the CBS break-f0r-advert music, and SEC’s non-understanding of the holding law on Saturday was trying to work out – some hours after the dust had settled – who in the hell was the best team in the SEC.

LSU’s offense had been stymied by Auburn, but still did enough to win (if Auburn had had any offense, this article might be different). Alabama destroyed Arkansas…….but it was Arkansas.

At the bottom, it’s easier. Arkansas is the bum of the division, and might well be one of the worst Power-5 teams in the country (CONFIDENT BET: They would beat Rutgers).

I also went 4-1 straight-up this week, only missing out on Missouri’s abysmal performance against Kentucky.

Anyway, so here we go.

1. LSU (8-0): The Tigers struggled, held, bashed, and got it done against Auburn. LSU wasn’t brilliant, but they weren’t terrible. The offensive line gave Joe Burrow enough time to throw for 32 completions in 42 attempts, and for 376 yards, 1 TD and 1 INT.
2. Alabama (8-0): No Tua, no problem. The Tide whacked a horrible Arkansas team. The lightshow beforehand spurred Nick Saban’s passionate comments beforehand, although there was some annoyance that the lightshow was still going when Arkansas was trying to get a snap put together.
3. Florida (6-1): The Gators chomped through bye-week. If they can keep Jonathan Grennard and Jabari Zuniga healthy for the Cocktail Party, Dan Mullen might have a Bulldog as a scalp.
4. Georgia (6-1): The Bulldogs will hopefully have spent bye week working out a better scheme than three yards and a cloud of dust. It might work for a bit against Kentucky, but it ain’t gonna work against Florida.
5. Auburn (5-2): If only the Tigers had an offensive plan. If only. If Gus Malzahn gets fired, it will be because of his offensive plan. We also know this: Bo Nix is a freshman quarterback, and is now playing like one.
6. Texas A&M (5-3): All gamblers who took Texas A&M -10 over Mississippi State should be thanking the bookmakers for making it the easiest bet of the day.
7. Kentucky (4-4): Lynn Bowden, the converted WR-now-QB, caused Missouri a ton of problems in the Wildcats’ runaway victory in the rainstorm on Saturday. The Wildcats are a good side, and we underestimated them.
8. Tennessee (3-5): Tennessee has won two out of the last three SEC games, and dropped 41 on South Carolina in the process. The cylinders at Neyland are beginning to fire, and there’s a smile on Pruitt’s face.
9. Missouri (5-3): The Tigers’ hangover after the loss to Vanderbilt was evident, and the team is falling fast after their second straight incompetent loss. The fire under Barry Odom’s ass is warming up, too.
10. South Carolina (3-5): South Carolina WR Bryan Edwards made an unwordly catch against Tennesee, but where was the defense? After giving up 41 points, we’d say non-existent.
11. Ole Miss (3-5): Win over Bye Week. We are still unsure about Matt Luke.
12. Vanderbilt (2-5): Vandy has some momentum here. And the fact that it can’t be in worse shape than the two teams below it.
13. Mississippi State (3-5): The Bulldogs are an utter trainwreck. They didn’t put up a lot of fight against Texas A&M, and lost their fourth straight. The knives are sharpening for Joe Moorhead – despite the fact that a lot of people forget that three of his defensive players went pro last year. The offense isn’t particularly mobile, and it can’t rely simply on Kylin Hill – who actually had his best day of the season against A&M.
14. Arkansas (2-6): Chad Morris has called the Hogs in his press conference, telling the media that the Razorbacks ‘were going to win’ against Mississippi State. Right now, it’s Arkansas’ best bet to bring home, er, any sort of bacon with their 89th-ranked defense and 98th-ranked offense.

It’s Week 9 of the college football. Sadly. We don’t have a lot of this beautiful season left, but let’s enjoy this year, shall we? After all, there’s still some games to go to.

This week’s the one that a lot of people look forward to: LSU and Auburn. It’s not necessarily for the rivalry itself (both teams hate Alabama with vehemence), but for the fact that for some reason there seems to be weird things happening every time the teams play. It’s been a game where we’ve seen incredible ineptitude at field goals (Auburn’s John Vaughn – five of them – in 2005), that saw the firing of a once-beloved coach (Les Miles, 2016), cigar smoking (Auburn players in 1999), death threats (LSU’s QB Jamie Howard got a lot of them after throwing 5 fourth-quarter INTs in 1996) last second jaw-dropping catches (LSU’s Demetrius Byrd, 2007), and games where both sides have shot themselves in the foot (Auburn 2017 and 2018). Oh, and literal burning of a barn (1996).

It’s weird, it’s wonderful, and it’s a game that’s always in the Top Five of games that this writer looks forward to in the SEC every year.

1. No.9 Auburn at No.2 LSU (-10 1/2): This year, there’s no question that LSU is rolling. Joe Burrow looks like a Heisman contender, and the team is undefeated. On the other hand, Auburn fans are weirdly miserable, despite the team being 6-1 , ranked ninth in the nation, and actually looking pretty good. The bookies have Auburn as 10 1/2 point underdogs, seemingly forgetting that the Tigers have the best defense in the country. This will be closer than most people think, although LSU pulls it out at the end. PREDICTION: Bet on this at your peril. LSU by 10 after a fourth quarter touchdown. Auburn fans restart the hot seat for Gus Malzahn.
2. Arkansas at No.1 Alabama (-31): Tua isn’t playing, which ups this game in the neutral viewer’s mind from ‘This is going to be a terrible game, so I’m not going to watch it’ to a ‘I wonder how they’ll do with Mac Jones, and I might watch two quarters of it until Alabama’s up 20 at half time’. This is what makes it interesting. Arkansas is so bad though, it’s not even getting funny anymore. PREDICTION: Alabama by 42, proving the point that Mac Jones is fine, and Alabama have got more weapons than the local gun range.
3. South Carolina (-4 1/2) vs Tennessee: South Carolina didn’t get the calls to pull off the upset against Florida, but they hardly helped themselves in the rain either, giving up four leads, and Ryan Hilinski going 17-for-35. Now, they are favored when they walk into what should be an obnoxiously loud Neyland Stadium, where where we’re expecting more orange than grey in the seats, now that Big Orange is feeling hopeful again. The thoughts about Jeremy Pruitt’s tangle with his quarterback seems to be quietened after a glut of good recruiting news and keeping it close against Alabama. This might be funner than most think. PREDICTION: Tennessee wins by 7.
4. Missouri (-10) at Kentucky: Two years ago this game featured brainless plays from Missouri, as well as controversial call by the referees not to stop play during the Tigers’ final drive. It still sticks in the craw of Missouri fans. This year, there’s anotehr thing that sticks in their craw: The sheer capacity for the team to blow their feet off with awful losses. At the start of the year it was Wyoming, and then the inexcusable one against Vanderbilt last week. Kelly Bryant is meant to be a runner but doesn’t seem to want to, preferring the league to see him a touch pocket passer that he thinks is, but blatantly is not. In Kentucky, the weather is predicted to be TERRIBLE at Commonwealth Stadium. Last week Kentucky played in a game – in what seemed like monsoon conditions – and lost 21-0 to Georgia. PREDICTION: In a sloppy, ugly and weirdly fun game, Missouri wins by 7.
5. Mississippi State at Texas A&M (-10 1/2): A&M have been so darned unimpressive this year that they are less than two touchdown favorites against a team that’s falling at breakneck speed. Kellen Mond doesn’t seem to be liked by anybody, but as we’ve said repeatedly, if Jimbo Fisher allows OC Darrell Dickey to open up the playbook a bit and let him run, then people would have more confidence in him. As for Mississippi State, they don’t seem to believe in Joe Moorhead. This team lost THREE NFL first-rounders in Jeffrey Simmons, Montez Sweat and Johnathan Abram, so we weren’t going to expect a whole lot defensively from the Cowbellers, but the offense has been horrific. PREDICTION: A&M wins by 21.

LSU and Alabama once are battling it out for the best team in the SEC, and possibly in all of football.

The problems for the SEC is that they are both in the SEC West, which means that only one of them will go to Atlanta.

And at the moment, it’s hard to work out who’s better. So we went with schedule, rather than beauty. Because if it went with beauty, they would both be at No.1.

1. LSU (7-0): LSU’s offense looked human for a couple of stops against Mississippi State, and got its butt together and put up 36 in an easy victory. Joe Burrow is looking like a bona fide Heisman candidate, and the rush is also looking excellent.
2. Alabama (7-0): Alabama wasn’t very good against Tennessee, and Alabama knows it. Sure, Tua’s high ankle sprain may have hurt team confidence, but teams who have quarterbacks worse than Alabama’s backup, Mac Jones, have beaten them. The defense pulled out the stops to stop it being an embarrassment, but still.
3. Florida (6-1): The Gators may have had the benefit of the refs at stages during their hard-fought victory at rain-drenched South Carolina, but that doesn’t stop the fact that Dan Mullen’s team can beat Georgia in the Cocktail Party in a couple of weeks’ time.
4. Auburn (5-1): We thought that Auburn’s game against Arkansas would be closer than we thought. We were wrong. Auburn thrashed the putrid Razorbacks 51-0, thanks in no small part to Bo Nix’s three TD performance. We will see how they measure up in Death Valley, which could well be crazy.
5. Georgia (6-1): It was vomitously ugly for the most part against Kentucky, but the Bulldogs – after getting booed off the park in the first half, came through with a 21-0 victory. The rain didn’t help Jake Fromm & Co, but they had better be a lot better against Florida, or this will be their second ‘L’ of the season and put them out of Play-Off contention – something we thought would be impossible by early November.
6. Texas A&M (4-3): AND STILL…..THE BEST THREE-LOSS TEAM IN THE COUNTRY….
7. Missouri (5-2): Missouri was inept at Vanderbilt. Absolutely inept. Suddenly the locals are grumpy about the state of the program (again) and asking themselves if Barry Odom was the right choice. Weird, because last week they were cheering his name. Anyway, Derek Dooley didn’t get it right, but Missouri still should be the 3rd-best team in the SEC East.
8. South Carolina (3-4): The Gamecocks could have claimed their second straight upset of the day if they had had the rolls against Florida, but it wasn’t to be. USC aren’t great, but they are better than the record suggests.
9. Ole Miss (3-5): The Rebs aren’t great, but they sure put in a fight against A&M before succumbing.
10. Tennessee (2-5): UT is showing so much fight right now that the fans are starting to believe again. Will they win out? Probably not. But the fans should come back to Neyland again.
11. Kentucky (3-4): The offense showed it was inept against Georgia after getting shut-out in a biblical flood in Athens. We’re not confident going forward, either.
12. Mississippi State (3-4): The Cowbellers battled with LSU for large parts of the game, but in the end it was all about talent. And LSU had an abundance of it – and confidence. People should give Joe Moorehead more leeway after the defensive talent he lost to the NFL, though.
13. Vanderbilt (2-5): Derek Mason’s speech after the win against Missouri had all of of us fired up. The Commodores might get rid of him at the end of the season, and if that happens, he should get another job with the big boys pretty quickly as a one of the best defensive minds out there.
14. Arkansas (2-5): At what point are the big guns at the DW going to say: “This was a crappy idea of us to hire Chad Morris, we should boot his ass”. Because right now, the Razorbacks are awful and getting worse.

On paper, this is the hangover to last week’s drunken hijinks in the SEC. We saw a big party at LSU, with the booze flowing early doors, College Gameday excitement, and parachutes before the Tigers played the Florida Gators in a bruising evening game match-up. LSU won, and everyone it seems celebrated.

In Georgia, the hangovers were quite different, as hundreds of thousands of fans went from outlandish bark to tiny whine as their beloved team lost to the crowing Gamecocks of South Carolina, who left armed with some hedge branches and the biggest upset of the year so far.

On the other end of the spectrum, the smell of a steaming turd of a season festers in the nostrils of Vanderbilt fans, with those from Arkansas and Mississippi State not far behind.

Anyway, it’s Week 8 of the season. We’re going to be inspired, because, you know, it’s the SEC. So here’s our games in order of what’s going to be interesting.

1. No.9 Florida (-5) at South Carolina: With South Carolina’s victory at Georgia, suddenly Will Muschamp is loved. Dan Mullen’s loss at LSU was one of far more respectable than that of their hated rivals in red, and they seem to be in much better shape. Especially as they have a quarterback who’s not injured. We think that Tyler Hillinski’s going to be in worse shape than Will Muschamp’s letting on. Even if Florida’s without future NFLers Jonathan Greenard and Jabari Zuniga, they don’t have to really worry about a poorly Gamecock offense. PREDICTION: This will be tight until the fourth quarter, but Gators win out by 10.
2. Kentucky at No.10 Georgia (-25): Georgia’s going to come out of this one angry. Very angry. Jake Fromm will throw it less than the 51 times that he did against South Carolina, and Kentucky will be find it hard to stop D’Andre Swift, who’s been UGA’s best player this year. Mark Stoops isn’t going to comment on who will be the starter, but personally I’d give it to Lynn Bowden, who had a great game on Saturday, albeit against the off-color bacon that is Arkansas. He could challenge Georgia with his feet. PREDICTION: Georgia will be out to impress. And impress bad. Georgia by 31.
3. Texas A&M (-6) at Ole Miss: Our piece a few days ago said that is Ole Miss could find a QB who matched John Rhys Plumlee’s legs and Matt Corral’s arm, they would be golden. Texas A&M fans are fed up with being told that they are the best three-loss team in the nation, and are sick of the excuses that stem from the fact that they are an extremely ordinary side, which has finally been booted out of the Top 25 and now stands below Texas, Baylor and SMU in the Texan Pride Polls (which mean absolutely nothing but will be sure to irritate the Yellers). Fisher seems to be unsure of what to do with Kellen Mond, and the Aggies can’t produce on the ground. Crazily, this could be the game of the week. PREDICTION: Ole Miss with the upset, winning by 3. 
4. No.2 LSU (-18) at Mississippi State: While Joe Brady is college football’s flavor of the month for all his offensive work with the Tigers, Joe Moorhead’s flavor is stagnating at a speedy rate, and the locals are getting grumpy. His quarterback experiments have been disastrous, and there is absolutely no confidence in the team….as seen by the 20-10 loss to Tennessee. CBS has got it as the 3.30pm game…..probably because they like watching car crashes as the eighteen-wheeler known as Coach O’s offense crumples the Cowbells, and the defense showing that it’s OK rather than terrible for one outing (at least). We can’t believe the spread’s only 18 points, frankly. PREDICTION: LSU by 28.
5. Missouri (-21) at Vanderbilt: It takes quite a lot to annoy Vanderbilt fans, but Derek Mason has managed to do just that. This team has looked terrible all season long, and it was capped by a disastrous home swing against UNLV, where the Running Rebels ran away with a double-digit victory that didn’t look close. We thought K’Shawn Vaughn would run all over UNLV. He actually had 140 yards and a TD, but that was all Vanderbilt’s offense could muster against one of the worst defenses in the country. We aren’t kidding. So now, Missouri comes to town, and the Tigers are on fire. Weirdly enough, they are winning the SEC East, and division victory is actually Kelly Bryant & Co’s hands. PREDICTION: Fire. Derek. Mason. Now. Missouri by 24.
6. No.11 Auburn (-19) at Arkansas: We actually saw some fight from the Razorbacks for the second straight game (they could and should have beaten Texas A&M), and if Auburn aren’t careful, this one’s going to be close. We think that the Bo Nix experiment has lost its gold tinge suddenly, and the loss of Boobee Whitlow is going to make the Tigers struggle. The defense is amazing, though. PREDICTION: Closer than you might think. Auburn by 10.
7. Tennessee at No.1 Alabama (-35): Like the sun, hope seems to spring eternally for the mad men of Neyland, and they were finally rewarded by a couple of trips to the Neyland Stadium en route to a cathartic victory over Mississippi State last week. The win snapped a SEC-losing streak, and now they play Alabama in an attempt to snap a 12-game losing streak against the Tide. Well, it’s not happening today. PREDICTION: Is the third Saturday in October anything but a date anymore? Alabama by 42. 

Today was a fun yet weird week for the SEC. The weird stuff happened at Sanford Stadium in Athens, Georgia, where the  No.3 Dawgs lost in double-overtime to a South Carolina side that was a 23-point underdog, but had also lost to Alabama, Missouri and, er, North Carolina.

In Baton Rouge, LSU beat Florida 42-28 in an awesome game in the Bayou, with the Bayou Bengals surviving mostly by superior firepower on a night that featured parachutists coming down from heaven, a raucous crowd, College Gameday, and a lack of Gary Danielson.

And on the other end of the spectrum, an awful UNLV team ran away from a terrible Vanderbilt side, Tennessee got its first SEC win of the season over freefalling Mississippi State and Kentucky beat Arkansas,

Elsewhere, Alabama cruised by Texas A&M, Missouri pretty comfortably beat Ole Miss in a comfortable one.

Anyway, so here are our SEC rankings:

1. LSU (6-0): Joe Burrow is quickly becoming involved in the Heisman conversation. They beat Florida on Saturday night in a shoot-out. We know that their defense isn’t great, but their offense just keeps on coming. It should be interesting to see if passing game coordinator/wide receivers coach Joe Brady is around next year. Because of his miracles with the LSU offense this year, we suspect he’ll either get his first head coaching job or he’ll get an offensive coordinator’s job at a bigger school. He won’t be short of offers.
2. Alabama (6-0): The Alabama wide receivers are so damned quick. Tua is so damned good. Najee Harris is an unstoppabe running back. The Tide on the offense are awesome. Can LSU stop them? We will see. But right now, they are second on strength of schedule alone.
3. Florida (6-1): We said that this was a very good Gators side when they beat Auburn, and nothing has changed here. But defensive injuries meant that the Gators struggled late. Still, Dan Mullen’s team could well see Alabama or LSU in Atlanta again at the SEC Championship Game. They are that good.
4. Auburn (5-1): Idle, and watching carnage around it actually helped the Tigers. And got them healthier.
5. Missouri (5-1): Kelly Bryant has got this offense buzzing, but Cale Garrett’s injury at linebacker could take the Tigers back a few notches when they face the big boys in Florida and Georgia.
6. South Carolina (3-3): The merry-go-round that is the SEC East (Missouri beats Georgia who beats South Carolina) doesn’t mean South Carolina’s a better side than Georgia, but it happened.
7. Georgia (5-1): “I always thought they were overrated anyway” said a friend of mine – a student at Georgia – after witnessing the horror show on Saturday afternoon. For me, this has blown Georgia’s chances of getting into the play-off. Because even if the Bulldogs DO get to the SEC Championship Game, the Committee will ask the question: “Yeah, but who did they lose to?” The Bulldogs will go up the rankings again soon, but right now, they are a middle-of-the-road SEC side.
8. Texas A&M (3-3): Texas A&M lost to all the teams we thought they’d lose to, and struggled with Arkansas. This Aggies team aren’t that great.
9. Ole Miss (3-4): If Ole Miss could gel two quarterbacks into one (Corral’s arm and Plumlee’s legs), they would be golden. But right now, Ole Miss is mediocre.
10. Kentucky (3-3): We don’t know what to think of the Wildcats, but they beat Arkansas after sliding a little. They aren’t great, but they have taken a massive step back from last year. Their new QB Lynn Bowden is pretty useful, though.
11. Tennessee (2-4): The Volunteers’ victory breathed hope into the country’s laughing stock, and there is once again hope around Neyland. Who would it have happened after they went toe-to-toe for one half with Georgia.
12. Arkansas (2-4): The Razorbacks are playing with a bit of fire suddenly. Sure, the defense struggled against a Kentucky freshman QB today, giving up a 13-0 lead before losing 24-20. Right now, November 11th looms large…a match-up with Mississippi State that they should be favored in.
13. Mississippi State (2-4): We know that they beat Kentucky a couple of weeks ago, but this program is in such freefall that if you put these two together again, we’d be betting Kentucky all the way.
14. Vanderbilt (1-5): If Vanderbilt’s AD was a least bit clever, they should fire Derek Mason now and get a jump on a search for a head coach. He’s a great guy, but there’s nothing else to say. He’s got to go.