Post Week 11 SEC rankings: No beastiality thanks, but LSU rule

LSU’s band’s commitment to asking Alabama fans to commit beastiality on Mike The Tiger was evident on Saturday night, after the Tigers finally beat Alabama 46-41 in Tuscaloosa. It was a fantastic game. LSU plundered points from Alabama miscues, flying out to a 33-13 lead at half-time, before deciding to play conservatively, helping the Tide to roar back within 6. Then Joe Brady took the microphone back over, the spread offense which has entertained us all season long came back into action, and Clyde Edwards-Helaire’s touchdown in the final breaths of the game virtually confirmed victory. And to make matters better, Justin Jefferson, brother of one of the most hated LSU quarterbacks in history (Jordan), caught the onside kick that sealed

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Who wins College Football’s biggest showdown?

It’s hard not be excited about this weekend’s clash between LSU and Alabama in Tuscaloosa. College Gameday’s excited. CBS is excited. The SEC is excited. The 100,000 fans who are going to be there are excited, plus the thousands who are going to be tailgating. The College Football Play-Off Committee – who voted LSU No.2 and Alabama as No3 – is excited. Oh, and Donald Trump’s excited. He just loves college football, man, he’s not there for political capital or anything. This is going to be a showdown of offenses. Both are sizzling right now. Joe Burrow and Tua Tagovailoa have got their offenses on afterburn, helped by explosive future NFL wide receivers on both sides. The defenses? Both have looked

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Week 7 Rankings: Has Georgia blown its Play-Off chance?

Today was a fun yet weird week for the SEC. The weird stuff happened at Sanford Stadium in Athens, Georgia, where the  No.3 Dawgs lost in double-overtime to a South Carolina side that was a 23-point underdog, but had also lost to Alabama, Missouri and, er, North Carolina. In Baton Rouge, LSU beat Florida 42-28 in an awesome game in the Bayou, with the Bayou Bengals surviving mostly by superior firepower on a night that featured parachutists coming down from heaven, a raucous crowd, College Gameday, and a lack of Gary Danielson. And on the other end of the spectrum, an awful UNLV team ran away from a terrible Vanderbilt side, Tennessee got its first SEC win of the season

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Week 7 Preview: Who’s going to win the LSU-Florida clash?

It’s Week 7 in the SEC, and things are suddenly getting interesting. On Saturday night we’ve got the battle of the unbeatens as Florida travels to LSU. College Gameday will be there. It’s a night game in Death Valley, and thank God, Gary Danielson will not be there. Earlier, Alabama will go to Kyle Field to play Texas A&M on the CBS 3.30 game, and Georgia hosts South Carolina to start the day. Otherwise, it’s Mississippi State going to Tennessee (12pm), the battle of the NCAA-sanctioned as Ole Miss travels to Missouri, and a game that no-one should subject anyone to watch as Arkansas travels to Kentucky. Oh, and UNLV travels to Vanderbilt.   To say the least, it’s cardiac

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Week 6 rankings: Gators chomp, Georgia rolls

Right, so we’ve been plunged into the deep end by Week 6 of the college football season. In the AP’s rankings, Alabama is No.1, followed by Clemson, Georgia, Ohio State, LSU and Oklahoma. Florida, Wisconsin, Notre Dame and Penn State fill out your Top 10. Auburn (12th) and Texas A&M (24th) are the other SEC teams on the list. So here are our power rankings for the SEC. This is less about ‘how they look’ and more about ‘who they’ve beaten’. Florida (6-0): Beat Auburn in a monstrously noisy atmosphere in The Swamp. It was like being back in Spurrier’s time again. Yeah, it wasn’t pretty (they turned the ball over 4 times), but the Gators’ defense is amazing. The LSU

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After being in the transfer portal, we’re baaaack!!!

Sorry for the radio silence. We weren’t renaming ourselves. Or firing people – because there’s one of us, and that’s me. It’s because I requested a transfer. Put myself in the transfer portal. And the wife and I have moved to the hot cooker of football – Texas. We’re in Houston, where the oil money flows like the water in the Bayou and the mosquitos are manic. It’s great because I can watch SEC games in the same time-zone, not sit there watching until 5am every morning like I have one in the UK. Our only problem has been the internet. AT&T sucks. But thanks to the next-door neighbors, we’re back. For half a season. But half a season’s better than

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The SEC is a megachurch, a denomination, and a religion

It’s nighttime in Death Valley. The War Eagle Flies. We’re running through the T. We’re chomping. We’re asking how ‘bout them Dawgs. We’re clanging, pig sooein’, rammer jammerin’, Ole miss by damn’. We’re a 12th Man, the ZOU in MIZ, a Commodore, and a Wildcat. There’s even 2001 or maybe a Sandstorm. Our churches aren’t small. They are megachurches, holding a screaming congregation that will bury you with noise. They’ve even been allowed some in-game communion wine to add to their palates during services now. It should make Saturday church a little louder. When they win with a God-given upset, they jump over railings, get stuck in hedges, surf goalposts through crowded streets and toilet paper trees. When they lose,

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The SEC needs a nine-game conference schedule

Beyond the transfers, the head coaches, the stadium reductions and the backhanders to recruits, the NCAA can change something else that would really take the sport a step forward: The schedules. The ACC and SEC play 8 in-conference games and 4 non-conference games, while the Big Ten, Pac-12 and Big XII all play nine. Gus Malzahn and Nick Saban both expressed a preference for nine games. In fact, Nick Saban has been lobbying for it since 2012, while Gus Malzahn last year admitted he’s had a Damascus experience on scheduling (probably because Auburn’s is so arduous year after year): “Nine I think is best for us moving forward to make the schedules more equal across the conference.” Kirby Smart of

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Alabama – Clemson IV: A very quick National Championship Game preview

This Monday is the College Football finale between two teams that EVERYBODY thought would get there: Alabama and Clemson. It’s no secret that both teams are amazing. Both teams are stacked with first round draft picks. Both teams have five-star quarterbacks who been revelations. Both teams have insanely good wide receivers and running backs. And their defenses? Whoa. The only bad thing about the National Championship is that it’s going to be played in Santa Clara, California. My brother – who lives there – said to me: “Why in the hell are they having a massive college football game during rush-hour on a weekday? The place is hard to get to and isn’t a great stadium experience? The 49ers can’t even fill

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Why EVERY SEC team will win its bowl game

I love the bowl time of year. I get to ignore politics for a few hours and sit and balance a beer on my belly and watch college football. This is a beautiful time to be a SEC fan. We get to generally see a National Champion, and we get to celebrate by haunting others with our war cry: “SEC! SEC! SEC!”. I was going to go for a long, weaving preview of every bowl, but I realised that this (might) suffice. So here we go – Why EVERY SEC will win its bowl game. Why Vanderbilt (-4)will beat Baylor: Vanderbilt can stop someone, Baylor can’t. Vanderbilt’s got one of the most underrated running backs in college football in Ke’Shawn Vaughn,

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