Hurricane Matthew has postponed LSU’s clash with Florida at The Swamp on Saturday.

Both sides do not have an open date in common, and Florida refused to budge on moving the game to Baton Rouge for Sunday or elsewhere in the country.

“To try to put a road trip together of 150-plus people in a day and half, not knowing the condition of the roads, not knowing the conditions of the airports, trying to get equipment out there,” said Florida AD Jeremy Foley. “Again, not in the best interest of safety, not in the best interest of people that would be involved in that trip. … People in this state may be dealing with stuff that is far more significant, far more serious. So that really didn’t work, either.

“I really understand the interest in the game, people’s desire to play the game. At the end of the day, we make these decisions based on what matters, and people’s safety is what matters. That’s why the decision was made as it did. It took as long as it did because a lot of moving parts.”

If you wanted to be really unkind – and bearing in mind LSU’s loss to Auburn and Florida’s loss to Tennessee – you could suggest the date of the SEC Championship Game for it all to get played out. 

As much as travelling LSU fans will probably feel annoyed about not getting to go to the game, the hotels can now be packed with the most important people – evacuees escaping one of the nastiest hurricanes in US history.

“The timing of this storm on a Friday and the uncertainly of its aftermath in the ensuing days make it particularly difficult to project the conditions for the remainder of the weekend as well as the opportunity for travel of teams and fans to or from Gainesville and other cities in Florida. I am appreciative of the cooperation of our universities on this matter,” said SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey in a statement.

ESPN has reported that they could play on November 19th, when both LSU and Florida play ‘joke’ non-conference opponents in South Alabama and Presybterian. Cancelling the game would mean LSU pays SAU $1.5 million and Florida playing Presybterian $500,000. Rich as both sides are, it’s doubtful they’d like to do that.

So what are the options: 

1. The game gets played on SEC Championship Weekend, IF both teams aren’t in it. This, of course, would depend on Tennessee beating Alabama and Texas A&M, because it currently holds the tiebreakers over UGA and UF.
2. Buying out South Alabama and Presybterian. Not a bad idea. Although the last time we looked, the State of Louisiana doesn’t have a lot of money and probably wouldn’t look too kindly on playing three straight away games.
3. The game gets played a week after SEC Championship Weekend. Both teams probably aren’t going to be play-off teams anyway, and it will complete the schedule. And give CBS/ESPN a nice ratings boost to get a game of this magnitude watched.
4. They cancel it. Which would infuriate Florida season ticket holders (it’s unlikely they’d get a rebate for the loss of the game), for whom the LSU game is the biggest game of their schedule.

What sickens us to the stomach is that we’re nearly at the HALF-WAY POINT of the College Football season, which is basically the worst thing that’s happened in 2016 since the last crappy thing that happened in 2016.

Anyway, this week, the greatest thing that happened was Georgia beating Tennessee by a Hail Mary then getting a Dobbs-Nailed Boot to the nuts via another Hail Mary, aided by dumb playcalling and stupid penalties. What a game. Elsewhere, LSU looked damned good in utterly destroying Missouri, Alabama looked good for 2.5 quarters against Kentucky, and neither Florida or Vanderbilt looked good in their game. Texas A&M is also unbeaten but it looked pretty lacklustre against South Carolina, and the Ole Miss-Memphis game was a lot of fun.

So here are your SEC rankings:

1. Alabama (5-0): Because they seem unstoppable defensively, and when the offense clicks, it’s unstoppable as well. Mind you, they haven’t played a decent defense yet this year, have they? (Seriously, we don’t rate Ole Miss as a ‘decent defense’ anymore).
2. Texas A&M (5-0): Great wide receivers, and an exceptional defense. Can’t wait to see The Battle Of The SEC’s Best Wide Receivers when the Aggies play Tennnesee on Saturday. College Gameday’s going to be at College Station too.
3. Tennessee (5-0): That was a hell of a finish in Athens. This Vols team never gives up. But get this: Tennessee is still a team that seems to be only capable of playing when it’s double-digit scores down. Everyone will tell you it’s the ‘Miracle Vols’ – and maybe it is – but against Texas A&M and Alabama, their exercise of going down double digits before waking up might prove to be a problem.
4. Ole Miss (3-2): Because the Rebels are a lot of fun to watch, and although they nearly blew a comfortable lead against Memphis, they didn’t, and The Elvis Cup was theirs. We need to have this game every year, by the way. Gosh it’s a lot of fun.
5. Arkansas (4-1): After the loss against Texas A&M it’s hard for me to say that this team is really that good, and a win over Alcorn State is not going to change my mind about how great this Razorbacks team is. It’s really not that good. A win over Alabama would, though!
6. LSU (3-2): 634 yards of offense. Derius Guise is a FREAK. Darrel Williams is a FREAK. More than made up for Danny Etling trying to get itself killed. LSU had energy – even if the roar from Death Valley was the one at Clemson rather than the one at Baton Rouge this Saturday night (the place wasn’t full). But still, LSU suddenly looks a scarier prospect for Florida than it did 2 weeks’ ago.
7. Florida (4-1): I’M SORRY, LSU VS AUBURN….THE FLORIDA VS VANDERBILT IS NOW THE WORST GAME OF THE YEAR.
8. Georgia (2-3): Georgia’s Hail Mary was a thing of beauty by Jacob Eason. The dumb penalties, the awful playcalling on the Dawgs’ own goalline and the missed tackles were a thing of first-year coaches by Kirby Smart. You hope. Mark Richt’s still unbeaten at Miami, by the way.
9. Auburn (3-2): Smashed Louisiana-Monroe like they were meant to do. Defense again looked good, and the offense looked good against a crappy opponent. Still one of the weakest teams in the SEC West, though.
10. Mississippi State (2-2): Had an off week. They were able to tell people how good Dak Prescott is and how they discovered him. This was a good week for the Bell Boys.
11. Missouri (2-3): The last time I saw Mizzou get this owned was at the SEC Championship Game against Alabama a couple of seasons ago. Mizzou fans at the game didn’t seem to care…..they were too drunk. I hope that that was the case for the fans in Death Valley this weekend. I really do.
12. Kentucky (2-3): Put up a good defensive performance for 1-1/2 quarters against Alabama before getting run all over. If Kentucky had an offensive line, they might have worried the Crimson Tide. But it didn’t, so it didn’t. UK still beat South Carolina though (that’s why it’s 12th).
13. South Carolina (2-3): Brave, battling performance against A&M, but consistently snuffed by the Aggie defense (you’ll hear that a lot this year). Will Muschamp’s ‘D’ played pretty well, too. But they still lost to Kentucky.
14. Vanderbilt (2-3): THE FLORIDA VS VANDERBILT WAS THE WORST GAME OF THE YEAR….AND THEY LOST IT.

Ed Orgeron’s first game as LSU’s interim coach after the firing of Les Miles comes against Missouri on Saturday night, which may well get most of the attention on the SEC bill, although Tennessee’s trip to Georgia is a very interesting No.2. The other games might not raise too many eyebrows – with respect to Texas A&M’s trip to South Carolina!

So here are your games in order of interest level:

1. Missouri at LSU

Trust me when we tell you that it wouldn’t be an interesting game if Les Miles hadn’t been fired on Sunday and Ed Orgeron’s in charge. The other great thing about this game is that Brent Musberger’s calling it. The bad thing is that he has to work with Jesse Palmer, who no doubt will come with something inane. Watch out for Missouri’s offense – it’s had a lot of fun recently and could well test LSU – especially late on if the Tigers are having their own problems scoring (as has happened all season!).

PREDICTION: The king is dead, long live the king. LSU’s a 12-point favorite to win. We’ll take them to win by 14. Although if we’re honest, LSU fans would probably just take a victory with more than one touchdown and some good clock management!

2. No.11 Tennessee at No.25 Georgia

Tennessee’s second half comeback and subsequent shellacking of Florida was of the ages, but a lot more is expected of the Volunteers going into Sanford Stadium, where they are four point favorites. They face a Georgia team that was bludgeoned by Ole Miss – and quite rightly so – and ARE ONLY RANKED BECAUSE THE POLLSTER PEOPLE ARE ON DRUGS. Seriously – Georgia has no play at both lines, which will mean that a tacked-up Nick Chubb will (again) struggle. UGA’s Isaiah McKenzie could be fun to watch, though. On the other side of the ball, we’re starting to love Josh Dobbs, and he might well be the best QB in the SEC.

PREDICTION: Tennessee by 10 in a slugfest in which the Vols only cover in the fourth quarter. OTHER BOLD PREDICTION: Georgia’s line play is going to be inept. 

3. Memphis vs No.16 Ole Miss

Ole Miss looked gooooooood crushing the hell out of Georgia last week, but Memphis could actually give the Rebs more fits. They have played a far weaker schedule than Ole Miss, but they’ve actually looked pretty good.

PREDICTION: This could actually be pretty fun. Ole Miss is only a 14-1/2 point favorite, and for some reason we’re taking Ole Miss to win, but only by 10 in a really, really fun game.

4. No.9 Texas A&M vs South Carolina

One thing’s for certain: It’s going to be loud in Williams-Brice when the No.9 Aggies walk into the stadium to face Will Muschamp’s team. Not a lot is expected of the Gamecocks, who hilariously lost to an awful Kentucky team last week. Now, with South Carolina down, you’d probably think that NOW is the time that Muschamp will pull a win out of his behind and that they’ll call a stunning upset of the Top 10-ranked Aggies….but it ain’t going to happen. We will be shocked if it’s not out of control by half-time.

PREDICTION: Texas A&M’s an 18-point favorite. We think A&M by 21. And that’s being nice.

4. Kentucky vs No.1 Alabama

This won’t be close. Let’s not say that it will be, because it won’t be. Tim Williams’ suspension for the first half of the game for his pot/pistol arrest will make no difference whatsoever. Kentucky’s inability to tackle will.

PREDICTION: Alabama by 36 is what Vegas is calling for, so we think Alabama by 41. Because the Tide have got to beat the spread sometime, right?

5. No.24 Florida vs Vanderbilt 

Florida’s a 10-1/2 point favorite in Nashville, and it’s pretty predictable why. Vandy has shown us nothing in SEC play, and they avoided a bullet against Western Kentucky when the Hilltoppers went for two because, well, going for two is fun. Florida’s offense went from good-to-awful in the space of a half the last time they were in Tennessee (last week, in Knoxville), but they should have the athletes to win pretty easily.

PREDICTION: This should be the easiest money of the week. Florida by 21. 

6. Louisiana-Monroe vs Auburn

Apparently Auburn won in weird circumstances last week, and apparently it cost a head coach his job and apparently in between that weirdness some drunk German dude tried to burn down a Toomer’s Corner oak, and this week a student called Herron Taylor got an award from Auburn for trying to protect said tree but that doesn’t take away from the fact that we HAD TO WATCH THAT AUBURN VS LSU GAME BECAUSE IT WAS ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE FOR 99.9% OF THE GAME. This week the half-full crowd in Jordan-Hare should see more touchdowns against a not-very-good ULM team.

PREDICTION: Auburn is a 32 point favorite. We’ll take them to win by 41. 

7. Alcorn State vs No.20 Arkansas

Yawn. Razorbacks. Win. Not even erotic.

PREDICTION: Arkansas to win by 50. If it’s close, we’ll laugh.