Is every SEC team that’s not Alabama ordinary? Week 12 SEC Rankings
We didn’t want to admit it, but 85% (12 out of 14) of SEC teams are really, really ordinary. Some might be even worse than that.
SEC fans will tell you that the ‘ordinariness’ isn’t in fact that, it’s the fact that ‘anyone can beat anyone on ANY GIVEN SATURDAY IN THE SEC’, and that’s what makes the SEC so great, and other conferences so suck-worthy.
Of course, it’s the notion of ‘Every Given Saturday’ that makes college football so awesome, and not just the SEC.
But in fact, the SEC, B1G and ACC have something in common: They all boast a team that hasn’t won an in-conference game all season (Arkansas, Louisville, Rutgers).
And apart from Georgia and Alabama, everyone else in the SEC has two or more in-conference losses, meaning that no-one particularly stands out, meaning that my listings of ‘Power Rankings’ in the SEC against the notion of Who Was Impressive from week-to-week in the SEC gets hurt.
Despite all my whining, here’s my rankings for the SEC. We’re going in terms of less power, more ordinary.
- Alabama: EXTRA-ORDINARY TEAM. ESPECIALLY THE REFS AGAINST MISSISSIPPI STATE. IN NICK SABAN’S FAVOUR.
- Georgia: ORDINARY BECAUSE THEY HAD THEIR OFFENSIVE MISCUES AGAINST GEORGIA IN THE FIRST HALF. Y’ALL’S GOT TO BE PERFECT IF Y’ALL ARE GOING TO BEAT ALABAMA, Y’ALL.
- LSU: ORDINARY BECAUSE NICK BROSSETTE TOOK TWO KNEES INSIDE THE 5 AGAINST ARKANSAS AND LSU DIDN’T COVER THE SPREAD (Just kidding!).
- Mississippi State: ORDINARY BECAUSE THE SEC REFS MADE THEM ORDINARY (And Nick Fitzgerald slid for the first down but didn’t make it because he slid too early).
- Auburn: ORDINARY BECAUSE DEAR LORD HAVE YOU SEEN THAT OFFENSE?
- Texas A&M: ORDINARY BECAUSE THERE’S NO BETTER FOUR-LOSS TEAM IN THE COUNTRY WHO CAN BEAT OLE MISS.
- Kentucky: ORDINARY BECAUSE THEY LOSE TO 4-5 TENNESSEE EASILY (AND HAVE NO OFFENSE) AS A RANKED TEAM, AND THE BIGGEST LAUGH OF THE WEEKEND CAME FROM WHAT HAPPENED AT LOUISVILLE.
- Missouri: ORDINARY BECAUSE THEY SHOOT THEMSELVES IN THE FOOT. OVER AND OVER AGAIN. YET SOMEHOW BARRY ODOM KEEPS SAVING HIS BUTT
- Florida: ORDINARY BECAUSE THE FANS DON’T FILL THE SWAMP FOR THE SPURRIER-MUSCHAMP BOWL.
- South Carolina: ORDINARY BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO RUN DEFENSE.
- Tennessee: ORDINARY BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END OF FULMER’S REIGN TO THE END OF THE BUTCH JONES’ REIGN. LIKE A LOT OF LADIES IN THE SMOKIES, IT HAD ONE TOOTH AND A METH PROBLEM.
- Vanderbilt: ORDINARY BECAUSE SOMETIMES RICH KIDS DON’T GET GREAT THINGS.
- Ole Miss: THAT DEFENSE AIN’T ORDINARY, IT’S DOGS—-.
- Arkansas: SOON THE ORDINARY-TO-BAD SEASON WILL BE OVER, AND TUSKY WILL REALISE THAT HE PICKED A NICE TEAM TO RETIRE. UNTIL HE’S MADE INTO BRISKET.
But there were things that impressed us this week:
- Meredith and Luke were first in line waiting for the SEC Network to come along to Fayetteville, which got them a nice coach on set. The bad news for Meredith and Luke is that after the SEC Saturday Network crew had left, they had to sit and watch LSU handle their team. Not that they aren’t used to their team being handled, mind.
- Nick Brosette: The LSU RBs may have broken Vegas hearts by not running in for the score, but taking two knees at the end was the height of sportsmanship.
- Mississippi State’s defense: Were exceptional in the second half against the Tide. Completely and utterly suffocated Bama’s offensive line.
But some things really, really got under our skin:
- SEC refs in the Alabama – Mississippi State game: HOW WAS THAT NOT A FUMBLE? HOW WAS THAT A BLOCK IN THE BACK? Hell, even Gary Danielson, who’s got his head so far up Nick Saban’s behind that when Saban opens his mouth they see two pairs of teeth said repeatedly: “That’s a fumble”. The SEC has to deal with its referees. Right now, the conference is looking worse and worse.
- South Carolina: How did the offense go from 31 points to zero in The Swamp. Could there have been a worse half-time team talk than Will Muschamp’s at half-time.
- Auburn: The offense is still clueless. Especially the offensive line, which is plain awful.