Bentley cements case for South Carolina QB job

Jake Bentley was the starter as South Carolina’s quarterback in 2016, and after an excellent performance on Saturday at the Spring Football Game, he certainly cemented his spot for the year.

Bentley threw for 301 yards and 3 TDs, going 19 for 31 in the Garnet & Black Game in front of 12,000 people at Williams-Brice Stadium. The stadium crowd may seem slightly paltry for a SEC Spring Game, but if you consider that the team was playing in a Men’s Final Four Game and drinking time had to be cut by two hours so fans could make the game and tip-off for the basketball, 12,000 was pretty good.

Anyway, also playing well were running backs Ty’Son Williams, who had 83 yards on 11 carries and de facto starter Rico Dowdle,  who had 30 yards on 3 rushes.

Who’s the worst team in the SEC? (Hint: They play in the East)

The race for the bottom of the SEC was a really difficult race, made a lot harder to work out after the frankly illogical Mississippi State victory over Texas A&M, a win that should have been celebrated by the fanbase violently clanging bells on the field. We were shocked the field at Davis-Wade Stadium wasn’t invaded after the felling of the mighty Aggies, but there we go.

But it also made us think: Who in the heck is the worst team in the SEC? So here’s our countdown from 1-14. You can probably guess No. 14. Roll Tide.

  1. Missouri (0-5 SEC, 2-7 total) – Hasn’t won a game and while they looked competitive against South Carolina, this is a bad, bad team – especially on the defense. The fanbase seems to hate new DC DeMontie Cross and the decision to recalibrate the defense, and the offense is riddled with mistakes.
  2. Vanderbilt (1-4, 4-5) – The defense is definitely doing some good things, but the offense is still terrible.
  3. South Carolina (3-4, 5-4) – Back-to-back SEC victories is suddenly exciting a fanbase about the Will Muschamp hire. We’re still not excited about the Gamecocks for 2016, although Muschamp’s 2017 class – considering how good he is a recruiter – could be something to watch.
  4. Mississippi State (2-3, 4-5) – The win over Texas A&M boosted them up the table, but you still think that things would have been different had Trevor Knight and Myles Garrett not been injured during the game.
  5. Kentucky (4-3, 5-4) – Gave Georgia the fright of its life and it’s a lot of fun to watch the Wildcats on offense. Defensively, they are a shambles.
  6. Georgia (3-4, 5-4) – Georgia’s medicore. That’s all there is to really say (They beat UNC, South Carolina, Missouri, Kentucky and should have beaten Tennessee, but were slaughtered about Florida, and lost to Vanderbilt and things will probably be really ugly against Auburn)
  7. Ole Miss (1-4, 4-5) – Chad Kelly’s injury ain’t going to make things a lot easier. Defensively again this has been a trouble.
  8. Florida (4-2, 6-2) – Boatraced on the road at Arkansas. The offense hasn’t clicked for most of the season. We will see how the Gators do down the stretch against LSU and FSU. This could get nasty.
  9. Tennessee (2-3, 6-3) – The only saving grace for Tennessee this season has been the win over Florida and the taking Texas A&M to double overtime despite the injury horror show. How much they’ve rebounded from the other horror show – the debacle at South Carolina – remains to be seen. They also haven’t managed to play a 100% good game this year. Butch Jones for Coach Of The Year? Nope.
  10. Arkansas (2-3, 6-3) – The excellent performance against Florida seems to indicate things going in the right direction, although whether this is a minor blip for Bielema remains to be seen what with LSU.
  11. LSU (3-2, 5-3) – The loss at home to Alabama showed us the importance of Les Miles actually recruiting a good QB, which he failed to do every since Zach Mettenberger.
  12. Texas A&M (4-2, 7-2) – This MSU loss was a bad day at the office. With the loss of Trevor Knight for the year and Myles Garrett’s injury really not 100%, we’ll see how bad this day at the office gets.
  13. Auburn (5-1, 7-2) – Hot Seat what? Gus Malzahn for Governor!
  14. Alabama (6-0, 9-0) – Nick Saban 2020. Just saying.

The SEC: Consistently Inconsistent

I’ll be honest, it’s damned hard to work out the SEC this year. That’s because almost everyone’s really inconsistent.

For example: Arkansas go and beat Ole Miss and then get massacred on the road to Auburn. They also had the chances to beat Texas A&M and killed themselves offensively, and then defensively, they killed themselves against Alabama. So what do we know about Bret Bielema’s side? Borderline – and very – erratic. And Bielema himself gets abused by his own professors. Which is kinda awesome.

Then there’s Tennessee, who were some people’s dark horse pick to go to the Play-Off, but haven’t put together four good quarters of football all season long. That means that it’s been extremely exciting for the Neyland faithful, but also very irritating. The injuries probably didn’t help when it came to playing Alabama at home (and getting crucified).

Of course, who could forget Ole Miss, who had two great halves of football against Florida State and Alabama….and are 0-2 in those games. They beat the living crap out of Georgia, but then lost a fun, fun, fun, fun game to Arkansas. And then were driven over (literally) but LSU.

Then there’s LSU, who were in such a dire situation they fired Les Miles. They are unbeaten since then – even though you should probably forget that all the Tigers’ games so far have been in the friendly confines of Death Valley. And that the Auburn loss probably wasn’t a bad one at all.

Florida got headlines so far for two things: 1) Getting into a fight with LSU about playing the game. 2) Saying crap to Tennessee and then blowing a big lead against a rival who really, really hates them. The consistency has come from the D, which is generally awesome. The offense? Yeah…so….

And Auburn? Their defense was incredible against Clemson, but the offense sputtered until it blew up for two weeks in a row, crushing Mississippi State and Arkansas. But Gus Malzahn’s got this team whirring, and it’s getting pretty good. One thing consistent is the idiots that seem to live on The Plains – especially the German arsonist d***head (hey, he’s a d***head, he’s German, and he’s an arsonist) who decided to burn one of the Toomer’s Oaks down.

Vanderbilt looked to be the model of consistency – the bad kind – until they played well enough to beat Georgia. So they’ve broken their SEC donut for this year. The defense is looking good. The offense is horrible. Should Derek Mason go be a defensive co-ordinator at a big, big school somewhere?

Texas A&M‘s kicker was hilarious(ly BAD) against Tennesee. The Aggies were punished for their errors against ‘Bama, who completely shut down their run game. Listen, if anyone told an Aggie fan they’d only have a loss this season so far they would have bitten your hand off. This Aggies side is pretty damned good, folks.

Georgia‘s a team who thought would be horrible this year because of their lack of line, but managed to look pretty good on those fronts against Tennessee and North Carolina (they ended up 1-1), but bizarrely looked crappy against Nicholls State and the aforementioned VandyAnchors. Oh, and we’ve definitely seen some dumbass decisionmaking from Kirby Smart. Like – let’s do a toss-sweep to Isaiah McKenzie on a 4th and 1 with the game on the line. Or throwing it IN THEIR OWN END-ZONE against Tennessee. Or a celebration penalty against Tennessee that would end up helping to cost them the game.

And Missouri? They are plain awful. Or is it grain awful? Anyway, the decision to change a perfectly good defensive situation is a JOKE, and the offense AIN’T A LOT BETTER. Losing to Middle Tennessee State may mean the Tigers don’t go to a bowl game for the second year in a row. Will the Tigers end their nine-game SEC losing streak soon? Er, against who?

South Carolina can’t get an offense moving in the SEC.

Kentucky can’t stop anyone on defense, but they are the most secretly fun team to watch in the SEC. Well, maybe them and Ole Miss and Arkansas.

Mississippi State‘s actually won a game in the SEC and played in a SECRETLY BAD/GREAT game against Kentucky last Saturday. That they lost.

And the one team that’s inconsistent. You may have heard them before. They’ve won 41 NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS, and they look odds-on to win NUMBER FORTY TWO. If there’s an offense that can capitalize on their mistakes, we’d like to fit in. Because at the moment, it’s Alabama and the rest. Why? Because Nick Saban’s the best head coach in the country and Lane Kiffin’s probably the best offensive co-ordinator. Steve Sarkasian, who’s also a very good OC, has sobered up enough to come on board as an advisor, and Jeremy Pruitt’s defenses are opportunistic, fast, and good. Oh, and the players ain’t bad either.

 

 

SEC Week 6: Hurricanes, bad names, and long-ass games

The only thing anyone was talking about this weekend was the fact that the LSU-Florida game got ‘postponed’ because of Hurricane Matthew and never may see the light of day again, which could lead to quite a ruckus in the SEC Standings – especially in the SEC West. Both ADs Joe Alleva (LSU) and Jeremy Foley (Florida) and SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey have made complete asses of themselves in all of this, and Sankey showed no backbone whatsoever.

Now, back to football: College Gameday’s ‘crowd’ at the start of ESPN’s 3-hour college football preview might as well have been The 1/12th Man, bearing in mind how small the crowd was, but it grew larger as the day wore on. I still want to punch the scheduler in the face for bring on The Chainsmokers, who showed no knowledge about the sport, but were able to pimp their buddies and a shoe company. The game itself was a 5-hour epic, not helped by the fact there were a ton of injury time-outs, it went to double over-time, and CBS had to have 164 EXTRA ****ING COMMERCIAL BREAKS. Of course, Clay Travis liked to blame the bands and the fact that they played for 40 minutes at half-time, but then again, it’s Clay Travis. I leave it at that.

Elsewhere in SEC Country, we learned – if we hadn’t already – that Arkansas doesn’t have a defense, Mississippi State without Dak Prescott is an abomination, Georgia’s offensive line really isn’t that bad (or is South Carolina’s terrible?), South Carolina’s got an awful offense, and Alabama is really, really scary on offense. 

So here are your rankings:

  1. Alabama (6-0): Nick Saban had another Napoleon-like tantrum when it became plainly obvious to anyone watching that his defense couldn’t stop Arkansas. But when your offense is up by three touchdowns to start the game off, it doesn’t really matter. Alabama has its starting QB for the next 3 (or 4) years, so other applicants should look elsewhere.
  2. Texas A&M (6-0): Texas A&M blew a huge lead, couldn’t convert 7 turnovers, missed a 37-yard field goal with time running out in hilarious fashion, and still came out victors against Tennessee. Now who’s the lucky ones? John Chavis was right to say that there are things to be learned on the defensive side of the ball. Stopping a running back might be one of them.
  3. Ole Miss (3-2): I’m dropping Tennessee down a place despite them taking Texas A&M to two overtimes on the road despite seven turnovers and a bunch of injuries? Yes. And here’s why: If Ole Miss and Tennessee played each other, I’m not sure Tennessee could stop Ole Miss. It would end up 70-69, though.
  4. Tennessee (5-1): This team can’t play two halves of football. But Good Lord those comebacks are fun to watch.
  5. Auburn (4-2): We know it seems this is pretty high for Malzahn’s team, but his defense is GOOD.
  6. LSU (3-2): Yeah…so Arkansas was that bad against Alabama.
  7. Florida (4-1): Yeah….so Arkansas was that bad against Alabama.
  8. Georgia (3-3): The good news: Nick Chubb was healthy. Sony Michel was healthy. The O-Line looked OK. Isaiah McKenzie is fun. The bad news: Jacob Eason is borderline erratic.
  9. Arkansas (4-2): Bret Bielema’s has no defense. After the TCU game, I think that was established. What is now concerning, is that Arkansas has no offensive line, either. The biggest star of the game was Arkansas Agriculture professor Dr. Lawton Lanier Nalley, who screamed at Bielema: “If I had your record, I would be ****ing fired. **** you!”. He was arrested. Would he be right? Probably not, but if Arkansas ends this season 5-7 – which it could quite easily do, the seat could be warming. Apparently Mr. Nalley was drunk. Well I never.
  10. Missouri (2-3): The guys at Mizzodcast – the best podcast around (in our humble opinion) for a SEC Team, are probably convinced that the bye week saved them a loss. I still think they are better than one SEC West team.
  11. Mississippi State (2-3): I watched Mississippi State this week get CRUSHED by Auburn, and I become more convinced that Dak Prescott was the only reason Dan Mullen looked like a good coach.
  12. Kentucky (3-3): Beat Vanderbilt in a horrible game, and convinced nobody.
  13. South Carolina (2-4): Lost to Kentucky, and the offense downright stinks.
  14. Vanderbilt (2-4): At the end of the season, Vanderbilt should fire Derek Mason or ask him if he wants to be the defensive co-ordinator. I’m not sure he’s got the hand of the offensive side of it.

 

 

Georgia vs South Carolina MOVED TO SUNDAY because of Hurricane Matthew

The Georgia vs South Carolina game has now been moved to Sunday, Will Muschamp has told reporters.

Kick-off time is unknown.

Roll Tide Rolling: Week 5 SEC Rankings

What sickens us to the stomach is that we’re nearly at the HALF-WAY POINT of the College Football season, which is basically the worst thing that’s happened in 2016 since the last crappy thing that happened in 2016.

Anyway, this week, the greatest thing that happened was Georgia beating Tennessee by a Hail Mary then getting a Dobbs-Nailed Boot to the nuts via another Hail Mary, aided by dumb playcalling and stupid penalties. What a game. Elsewhere, LSU looked damned good in utterly destroying Missouri, Alabama looked good for 2.5 quarters against Kentucky, and neither Florida or Vanderbilt looked good in their game. Texas A&M is also unbeaten but it looked pretty lacklustre against South Carolina, and the Ole Miss-Memphis game was a lot of fun.

So here are your SEC rankings:

  1. Alabama (5-0): Because they seem unstoppable defensively, and when the offense clicks, it’s unstoppable as well. Mind you, they haven’t played a decent defense yet this year, have they? (Seriously, we don’t rate Ole Miss as a ‘decent defense’ anymore).
  2. Texas A&M (5-0): Great wide receivers, and an exceptional defense. Can’t wait to see The Battle Of The SEC’s Best Wide Receivers when the Aggies play Tennnesee on Saturday. College Gameday’s going to be at College Station too.
  3. Tennessee (5-0): That was a hell of a finish in Athens. This Vols team never gives up. But get this: Tennessee is still a team that seems to be only capable of playing when it’s double-digit scores down. Everyone will tell you it’s the ‘Miracle Vols’ – and maybe it is – but against Texas A&M and Alabama, their exercise of going down double digits before waking up might prove to be a problem.
  4. Ole Miss (3-2): Because the Rebels are a lot of fun to watch, and although they nearly blew a comfortable lead against Memphis, they didn’t, and The Elvis Cup was theirs. We need to have this game every year, by the way. Gosh it’s a lot of fun.
  5. Arkansas (4-1): After the loss against Texas A&M it’s hard for me to say that this team is really that good, and a win over Alcorn State is not going to change my mind about how great this Razorbacks team is. It’s really not that good. A win over Alabama would, though!
  6. LSU (3-2): 634 yards of offense. Derius Guise is a FREAK. Darrel Williams is a FREAK. More than made up for Danny Etling trying to get itself killed. LSU had energy – even if the roar from Death Valley was the one at Clemson rather than the one at Baton Rouge this Saturday night (the place wasn’t full). But still, LSU suddenly looks a scarier prospect for Florida than it did 2 weeks’ ago.
  7. Florida (4-1): I’M SORRY, LSU VS AUBURN….THE FLORIDA VS VANDERBILT IS NOW THE WORST GAME OF THE YEAR.
  8. Georgia (2-3): Georgia’s Hail Mary was a thing of beauty by Jacob Eason. The dumb penalties, the awful playcalling on the Dawgs’ own goalline and the missed tackles were a thing of first-year coaches by Kirby Smart. You hope. Mark Richt’s still unbeaten at Miami, by the way.
  9. Auburn (3-2): Smashed Louisiana-Monroe like they were meant to do. Defense again looked good, and the offense looked good against a crappy opponent. Still one of the weakest teams in the SEC West, though.
  10. Mississippi State (2-2): Had an off week. They were able to tell people how good Dak Prescott is and how they discovered him. This was a good week for the Bell Boys.
  11. Missouri (2-3): The last time I saw Mizzou get this owned was at the SEC Championship Game against Alabama a couple of seasons ago. Mizzou fans at the game didn’t seem to care…..they were too drunk. I hope that that was the case for the fans in Death Valley this weekend. I really do.
  12. Kentucky (2-3): Put up a good defensive performance for 1-1/2 quarters against Alabama before getting run all over. If Kentucky had an offensive line, they might have worried the Crimson Tide. But it didn’t, so it didn’t. UK still beat South Carolina though (that’s why it’s 12th).
  13. South Carolina (2-3): Brave, battling performance against A&M, but consistently snuffed by the Aggie defense (you’ll hear that a lot this year). Will Muschamp’s ‘D’ played pretty well, too. But they still lost to Kentucky.
  14. Vanderbilt (2-3): THE FLORIDA VS VANDERBILT WAS THE WORST GAME OF THE YEAR….AND THEY LOST IT.

 

Will Coach Oeux win his first game? Week 5 SEC Predictions

Ed Orgeron’s first game as LSU’s interim coach after the firing of Les Miles comes against Missouri on Saturday night, which may well get most of the attention on the SEC bill, although Tennessee’s trip to Georgia is a very interesting No.2. The other games might not raise too many eyebrows – with respect to Texas A&M’s trip to South Carolina!

So here are your games in order of interest level:

  1. Missouri at LSU

Trust me when we tell you that it wouldn’t be an interesting game if Les Miles hadn’t been fired on Sunday and Ed Orgeron’s in charge. The other great thing about this game is that Brent Musberger’s calling it. The bad thing is that he has to work with Jesse Palmer, who no doubt will come with something inane. Watch out for Missouri’s offense – it’s had a lot of fun recently and could well test LSU – especially late on if the Tigers are having their own problems scoring (as has happened all season!).

PREDICTION: The king is dead, long live the king. LSU’s a 12-point favorite to win. We’ll take them to win by 14. Although if we’re honest, LSU fans would probably just take a victory with more than one touchdown and some good clock management!

2. No.11 Tennessee at No.25 Georgia

Tennessee’s second half comeback and subsequent shellacking of Florida was of the ages, but a lot more is expected of the Volunteers going into Sanford Stadium, where they are four point favorites. They face a Georgia team that was bludgeoned by Ole Miss – and quite rightly so – and ARE ONLY RANKED BECAUSE THE POLLSTER PEOPLE ARE ON DRUGS. Seriously – Georgia has no play at both lines, which will mean that a tacked-up Nick Chubb will (again) struggle. UGA’s Isaiah McKenzie could be fun to watch, though. On the other side of the ball, we’re starting to love Josh Dobbs, and he might well be the best QB in the SEC.

PREDICTION: Tennessee by 10 in a slugfest in which the Vols only cover in the fourth quarter. OTHER BOLD PREDICTION: Georgia’s line play is going to be inept. 

3. Memphis vs No.16 Ole Miss

Ole Miss looked gooooooood crushing the hell out of Georgia last week, but Memphis could actually give the Rebs more fits. They have played a far weaker schedule than Ole Miss, but they’ve actually looked pretty good.

PREDICTION: This could actually be pretty fun. Ole Miss is only a 14-1/2 point favorite, and for some reason we’re taking Ole Miss to win, but only by 10 in a really, really fun game.

4. No.9 Texas A&M vs South Carolina

One thing’s for certain: It’s going to be loud in Williams-Brice when the No.9 Aggies walk into the stadium to face Will Muschamp’s team. Not a lot is expected of the Gamecocks, who hilariously lost to an awful Kentucky team last week. Now, with South Carolina down, you’d probably think that NOW is the time that Muschamp will pull a win out of his behind and that they’ll call a stunning upset of the Top 10-ranked Aggies….but it ain’t going to happen. We will be shocked if it’s not out of control by half-time.

PREDICTION: Texas A&M’s an 18-point favorite. We think A&M by 21. And that’s being nice.

4. Kentucky vs No.1 Alabama

This won’t be close. Let’s not say that it will be, because it won’t be. Tim Williams’ suspension for the first half of the game for his pot/pistol arrest will make no difference whatsoever. Kentucky’s inability to tackle will.

PREDICTION: Alabama by 36 is what Vegas is calling for, so we think Alabama by 41. Because the Tide have got to beat the spread sometime, right?

 

5. No.24 Florida vs Vanderbilt 

Florida’s a 10-1/2 point favorite in Nashville, and it’s pretty predictable why. Vandy has shown us nothing in SEC play, and they avoided a bullet against Western Kentucky when the Hilltoppers went for two because, well, going for two is fun. Florida’s offense went from good-to-awful in the space of a half the last time they were in Tennessee (last week, in Knoxville), but they should have the athletes to win pretty easily.

PREDICTION: This should be the easiest money of the week. Florida by 21. 

6. Louisiana-Monroe vs Auburn

Apparently Auburn won in weird circumstances last week, and apparently it cost a head coach his job and apparently in between that weirdness some drunk German dude tried to burn down a Toomer’s Corner oak, and this week a student called Herron Taylor got an award from Auburn for trying to protect said tree but that doesn’t take away from the fact that we HAD TO WATCH THAT AUBURN VS LSU GAME BECAUSE IT WAS ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE FOR 99.9% OF THE GAME. This week the half-full crowd in Jordan-Hare should see more touchdowns against a not-very-good ULM team.

PREDICTION: Auburn is a 32 point favorite. We’ll take them to win by 41. 

7. Alcorn State vs No.20 Arkansas

Yawn. Razorbacks. Win. Not even erotic.

PREDICTION: Arkansas to win by 50. If it’s close, we’ll laugh. 

 

 

Ole Miss, Oh Damn…..Week 3 ratings

Did Hugh Freeze’s prayers to The Man Upstairs make any difference against Alabama? Well, at the start he must have thought that the Big H was going to deliver him and the Ole Miss faithful their third straight victory against Satan’s Tide when the Rebs took a 24-3 lead…..and then they choked. Choked. Choked all the way to a 48-43 lead.

Elsewhere, Leonard Fournette didn’t look like a Heisman contender, Missouri broke its fans’ hearts by losing 28-27 at home to Georgia, the knives are coming out for Gus Malzahn, and Kentucky were taken to task by New Mexico State until the end. Oh, and Florida, Tennessee and Arkansas did what they had to do against poor opposition, although Tennessee’s victory was certainly the least impressive. And to the Commodores: That was quite a beating by Georgia Tech, wasn’t it?

So here are your rankings from 1-14 of SEC Teams after Week 3:

  1. Alabama (3-0): Everyone scored touchdowns. Fat guys, thin guys, special teams guys……The Crimson Tide weren’t great, but they are the pick of the SEC.
  2. Arkansas (3-0): Bret Bielema’s got the Razorbacks playing. They did what they should have done against a poor team.
  3. Texas A&M (3-0): I’m getting increasingly excited by this Aggies team. The defense is good, and the wide receivers are baddass…as proved in the win over Auburn.
  4. Florida (3-0): Not saying a lot after playing three pretty poor teams, but the Gators are the pick for SEC East (in that we think they are better than Tennessee and far, far better than Georgia).
  5. Tennessee (3-0): At some point either the Vols will get better or they’ll play a team who’s on their talent level…and get crucified. I’m sorry, the whole “This Tennessee team’s really goin’ slow” B.S. getting trotted out at the moment isn’t for me. Tennessee have so far underwhelmed. And I include the win at Bristol.
  6. Ole Miss (1-2): If they played crappy opposition, Ole Miss would be 3-0. FSU and Alabama was always going to be tough, but the Rebs seem to be great at delivering their fans heartbreak week after week. And Chad Kelly’s the Second Coming of Bo Wallace, in the way that he happy dovetails dumb throw and good throw in equal measure. This is a pretty good team though – as Georgia will find out next week.
  7. LSU (2-1): How could such a talented team underperform so badly? When it’s LSU, of course! Leonard Fournette coughed up two fumbles (one recovered), and really didn’t look great in the second half. Danny Etling has good moments but wasn’t great, and LSU let Mississippi State come back to a point they nearly won. Unbelievable. I’m beginning to understand why the fans want Les Miles out….
  8. Georgia (3-0): This is the worst 3-0 in the SEC, and maybe the country. Should have lost to Nicholls last week and mildly avoided the loss against Missouri, who controlled the game. Nick Chubb will not win the Heisman, and that’s less about Louisville Superman Lamar Jackson and more about the Dawgs offensive line.
  9. Auburn (1-2): Great defensive line, no offense. And when the offense stalls, the defense gets tired, and the rest is the ‘L’, which Texas A&M gave them in Jordan-Hare. The LSU/Auburn game will not be for the neutrals (unless they have to go as part of a rehab stint).
  10. Missouri (1-2): Actually, should be 2-1 after today’s game. Crushing loss but some points coming out of it.
  11. Mississippi State (1-2): This isn’t a good side, and should have been shelled by LSU. But they hung on there, and had the chance to tie, if not win.
  12. South Carolina (2-1): Beat those people predicting the upset for East Carolina, something that must have Will Muschamp smiling, but the Gamecocks still aren’t a great team.
  13. Kentucky (1-2): Scored 62 on………………….New Mexico State. Conceded 42 against………….New Mexico State. Well, at least non-SEC UK games are entertaining. Or at least will be until the Louisville game, where they’ll get killed.
  14. Vanderbilt (1-2): Sorry, Vandy’s not going to win a SEC game this year.

Undeniable SEC statements from Week 2

Here’s a statement about each SEC team after their Week 2 performances, and we think you’ll find it undeniable.

If you think we’re talking B.S., tweet us on @SECblog.

  1. Alabama: It wasn’t exactly a surprise that Nick Saban lit Lane Kiffin’s ass on fire at the end of the Western Kentucky game. The team looked sleepy. They beat the spread, but only just! Also, Nick Saban’s strategy of saying unkind things about the team to fire them up for big games wasn’t lost on the Alabama media. It becomes a bit of a charade. Especially when the guy doing it could star in ‘Willow’.
  2. Tennessee: Caused five fumbles, and recovered them. And took advantage of Virginia Tech’s fumblefingers. This team may not be as bad as we thought they were against Appalachian State.
  3. Arkansas: When you make throat-slash gestures and your team loses to Bret Bielema, that’s karma, Kenny Hill.
  4. Georgia: The Bulldogs have no offensive line, according to a friend who was at the debacle against Nicholls State. “This will be a ****ing long season,” he added.
  5. LSU: Danny Etlng is maybe the new king of LSU. Mainly because Brandon Harris is a crapshow. We don’t know why Leonard Fournette didn’t play, but we presume he wasn’t injured.
  6. Ole Miss: If this game was preparation for Alabama, then this was, er, fine.
  7.  Kentucky: The Wildcats aren’t very good.
  8. Florida: Can’t wait for the Tennessee game. That’ll decide the East.
  9. Mississippi State: Great rebound against South Alabama. The lightning break was cool too. They are still the weakest team in the West. By a mile.
  10. Texas A&M: We thought they’d pitch a shut-out against mighty Prairie View A&M. We were right.
  11. Missouri: Hell froze over. Missouri scored 61 and won by 40. And Drew Locke looked good doing it, too.
  12. Auburn: They papered the new oaks after the win over Arkansas State. Sean White actually looked serviceable (he threw 3 TDs), folks.
  13. South Carolina: Kept on battling.
  14. Vanderbilt: Middle Tennessee State’s ‘D’ makes Vanderbilt’s offense look good.

Quick SEC Preview: The Games To Watch

There are going to be fantastic games this SEC season. Here are the top games to watch between SEC teams or involving SEC teams. Sorry, but Alabama vs USC or LSU vs Wisconsin aren’t going to be up there….

TOP NON-CONFERENCE GAMES

  1. Ole Miss vs Florida State — September 5th – Yep. That’s Monday Night Football. It’s going to be hot, humid, and the chance to see if Ole Miss can spring a surprise. There’s also a bingo to see how much ABC/ESPN say the words: “Sanctions”.
  2. Virginia Tech vs Tennessee — September 10th — Because college football in one of the best NASCAR tracks in front of 160,000 drunk people on the border of Tennessee and Virginia Tech (where Bristol, TN is situated) means just one word: FUN.
  3. Florida vs Florida State — November 26th – Because Florida could trainwreck Florida State’s chances of going to the College Football Play-Off. And maybe – just maybe – stamp their own credentials, too (if they beat Tennessee, Georgia and LSU in SEC play).
  4. Arkansas vs TCU — September 10th – Can Arkansas spring a surprise on a team that’ll be missing Treyvon Boykin?
  5. Clemson at Auburn – September 3rd – Two lightning-quick offenses with Clemson recovering from the loss of a lot of talent to the NFL in what will be an amped-up environment? Yes, we’ll take a bit of that.
  6. UCLA at Texas A&M – September 3rd – Josh Rosen (future NFL first rounder) vs Myles Garrett (Definite future NFL first rounder). We can’t wait. College Station will be noisy.
  7. LSU vs Wisconsin – September 3rd – Because both sides make liver damage seem cool.
  8. Alabama vs USC – September 3rd – It’s low on our list because we don’t think it’ll be an exciting game (Alabama will run riot, probably), but as a match-up of two college football bluebloods….YES! We hate the fact it’s in JerryWorld, though.
  9. UNC vs Georgia – September 3rd – A chance to see Jacob Eason and Kirby Smart’s first game. Don’t screw this one up, Kirby.
  10. Arkansas State vs Auburn – September 10th – Jacksonville State should have beaten Auburn last season. So why not Arkansas State this year?

TOP SEC GAMES

  1. Alabama at LSU — November 5th — This basically decides the SEC West and maybe a spot in the College Football Play-Off. Both seasons are probably going to go into this one unbeaten, which could make it a phenomenal game to watch. Gary Danielson will be at this game, so he’s sure to be annoying.
  2. Alabama at Tennessee – October 15th – Everyone feels that this is Tennessee’s best chance of turning over the Crimson Tide. Especially at Neyland Stadium, where the atmosphere will be cooking and most probably College Gameday will be on campus.
  3. Georgia at Ole Miss – September 24th – You don’t get to see these two play that often (the last time was in 2012), and the scene in Oxford will be awesome. Especially if both teams are unbeaten.
  4. LSU at Florida – October 8th – The biggest test for LSU’s play-off credentials will come in the evil known as The Swamp. It should be fun.
  5. Florida at Tennessee – September 24th – The Gators OWN the Vols, who haven’t beaten them since Philip Fulmer was in charge. This is the chance for UT to break the curse.
  6. Texas A&M vs Arkansas – September 24th – EVERY GAME BETWEEN THESE TWO ARE NUTS.
  7. Alabama vs Ole Miss – September 17th – It couldn’t happen again, could it?
  8. Tennessee vs Georgia – October 1st – UGA will be looking for revenge after last year, and this could be THE SEC East showdown.
  9. Florida vs Georgia – October 29th – This could be the case that the winner goes to Atlanta.
  10. LSU at Texas A&M  – November 24th – We can see the scenario: Les Miles is unbeaten, going into 5-6 Texas A&M and a tidy 14 point favourite. The win? LSU goes to Atlanta, and probably the Play-Off. He loses? The season ends. And….
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