Texas A&M Archives

Can Tennessee revive a little of its season? SEC Football Predictions

Right, it’s going to be a quick bunch of predictions this week, because if you’re a (or an, for grammar’s sake!):

FLORIDA fan and your team can’t beat JACKSONVILLE STATE at home

GEORGIA fan and your team can’t beat the triple-optioning, cut-blocking, GEORGIA SOUTHERN at home

TEXAS A&M fan and your team, with Johnny Football, Ryan The Receiver and KevinGod, can’t beat SAM HOUSTON STATE at home

ALABAMA fan and your team’s  got Nick ‘Not As Imperious As We First Thought’ Saban as your coach, can’t beat WESTERN CAROLINA at home

SOUTH CAROLINA fan and you’ve got Jadeveon Clown-Man Clowney on your team, can’t beat WOFFORD at home

AUBURN fan and, despite all that’s gone wrong to your team – which are about 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 things this year – and you can’t beat ALABAMA A&M at home

KENTUCKY fan, and even though you’re already gotten rid of your coach, you can’t beat SAMFORD at home….

You should fire your coach. Unless you’re Kentucky. When  you should fire just about everybody else, and then fire the next coach for just THINKING about coming to your school (Sorry Bobby, you’ve got no chance with Ashley Judd)….

BOTTOM LINE: All the SEC teams should win comfortably. Yes, even Auburn and Kentucky.

But otherwise….


Before the season Tennessee losing to Vanderbilt would have been a joke for the program – and the rest of the SEC. Right now, with Vanderbilt bowl eligible again and Tennessee already beyond the brink of uproar (We can still hear the ‘Dooley out’ screams ringing in our ears), the joke’s on Tennessee. And it’s not a funny one. Heck, Vegas are giving the Vols four points before their trip into Nashville. Listen, Vanderbilt’s OK, but they aren’t exactly the biggest cheese in the SEC by any imagination (BTW, anyone else think James Franklin might end up somewhere else after the season ends?), but don’t ignore Tennessee’s offensive weapons. Cordarelle Patterson and Justin Hunter can be lethal receivers, and Tyler Bray’s still not the worst QB in the SEC (step up, Kiehl Frazier!). His decision-making at time just SUCKS. Tennessee is going to have to come out throwing bullets because they are only two games away from being bowl eligible (and they had chances to win against Georgia, Tennessee and South Carolina this season). Anyone smell the ‘upset’?

BOTTOM LINE: Tennessee wins. Just. Won’t be enough to save Coach Dooley, though.


LSU fans don’t like Ole Miss very much. “The Grove is like a cocktail party where snobby Mississippians go to a cocktail party that they don’t even invite you to. They think they are better than you,” said one resentful LSU fan (what happened to him in Oxford last season, folks?!). Good job the game’s at LSU, eh? And while LSU took the loss to Alabama in their stride and beat Mississippi State comfortably, Ole Miss once again broke their fans’ hearts by losing in the last minute to Vanderbilt at home in the Chandelier Bowl. With the amount of talent that LSU has got on the field in one of their final home games (and with LSU having a chance of getting in the SEC Championship Game if Alabama loses to Auburn (QUICK ADVANCE PREDICTION: WON’T BE HAPPENING!!!), Ole Miss fans should be happy if they get to fill themselves with gumbo before the game starts…and the Rebs are competitive in the fourth quarter.

BOTTOM LINE: LSU by three touchdowns. Sorry, Ole Miss.


At the start of the season, a lot of us thought that Arkansas would want to win this game to be BCS-competitive. Now, everyone sees only one winner: King Cowbell. Tyler Russell and his merry band of Bellers could have closed the game to within a touchdown at LSU if he hadn’t thrown a 100-yard pick six in the closing minute or two, and Mississippi State showed that they can still cause turnovers. Which will be good for Cow-Town Belles, because they love to ring when Dan Mullen’s boys do their thing (ED: Enough of the Cowbell stuff now!!). Tyler Wilson and Knile Davis now need to prove that they are NFL-worthy after a rough season, and to win a competitive one for one of the nicest guys in the business. It’s been a rough season.

BOTTOM LINE: Ring, ring, ding-a-ling. Mississippi State by 10.


Strange to say this, but both teams come away having caused an upset last week. Syracuse demolished previously-unbeaten Louisville, while Mizzou beat Tennessee in Neyland Stadium in four overtimes. Dorial Green-Beckham caught two touchdowns. This week, Missouri has the chance to get bowl eligible (and start a winning streak….of two!) in Columbia on Saturday. Can they do it against a suddenly revitalized Orange team?

BOTTOM LINE: Can they kick it? Yes they can! Missouri gets bowl eligible, by winning by 7 in a better game than most people think it would be.






Rammer Jammer Slammered: SEC Rankings

Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, What in the **** happened, Alabama?

Tuscaloosa was full of sad faces as Texas A&M knocked off Alabama in the Game Of The Season (sorry, LSU game from last week!). But there were happy faces in Ole Miss (from Vandy fans, because their victory in Oxford ensured that they were bowl eligible for the second straight time – the first time this has happened in program history), Auburn (because Alabama lost, and from visiting Georgia fans because they won handily at Jordan-Hare), and other places in the SEC (because Alabama lost).

The only people super-furious, we should think, were Mike Slive and the SEC, because a) The SEC Championship Game is not going to be the biggest game on December 1st and b) The SEC right now isn’t going to be in the National Championship, because Oregon, Notre Dame and Kansas State are all unbeaten.

Anyway, here are our SEC Rankings after an amazing weekend of SEC Football. If you think the BCS rankings are hard to do, then try these ones….

1) Georgia – The Bulldogs are red-hot at the moment. The pollsters might look at the video and think: “Oh, they only beat Auburn 38-0”, but it could have been 60. Mark Richt called the Dawgs off very early indeed. This time will frighten Bama or LSU in the SEC title game.

2) Alabama – Yes, we realise that they lost, but if it hadn’t been for AJ McCarron’s INT in the end-zone, the Tide would have ended up winning this one…maybe.

3) LSU – While a 20-point victory doesn’t actually show how close the Mississippi State game was, LSU played well to take home victory. Their special teams could do with a bit of work, though. Oh, if only they’d beaten Saban last week, eh?

4) Florida – Victories aren’t normally horrific, but when they come against ULL in the last 5 seconds of a game – a week AFTER a 14-7 win over mighty Missouri – we know that the Gators were pretty overrated this year.

5) Texas A&M – Johnny. Football.

6) South Carolina – The horrible loss of Marcus Lattimore has been felt throughout Columbia, but at least the win over Arkansas helped matters.

7) Mississippi State – MSU could well have brought the game at LSU close if Tyler Russell hadn’t given up a 100-yard interception TD with a minute remaining. Don’t get us wrong- the Cowbellers are still overrated, but they ain’t as terrible as some people were making out.

8) Vanderbilt – Vanderbilt is bowl-eligible for the second straight time. This has never happened before in the program’s history. Good one, James Franklin 

9) Missouri – For those of you getting excited about Johnny Manziel, we’d like to throw out the name Dorial Green-Beckham, who had a coming-out party against Tennessee. This kid – if stays out of trouble – is gonna be good.

10) Ole Miss – Another week, another heart-breaking loss for Hugh Freeze’s side. This time is young, and will get better.

11) Tennessee – 0-6 in SEC play. Derek Dooley on the way out? We’ll start bidding for match tickets at Neyland Stadium for the Vandy game at $1.

12) Arkansas – I just looked at the stats: The Razorbacks are bad on both sides of the ball.

13) Kentucky – Because they didn’t play this week.

14) Auburn – Because they lost 38-0 (and the scoreline flattered them), their fanbase left at half-time and Gene Chizik has to go. Can the SEC not have a game in Atlanta on the Friday Night before the SEC Championship Game featuring the Tigers and Kentucky so we can find out who the SEC’s worst team is this year once and for all?

After The Game Of The Century: Week 11 SEC Predictions

Well, what a week that was.

Ole Miss got our hearts pumped by taking a 10 point lead at Georgia….and then conceded 37.

Missouri got our hearts pumped by taking a 7 point lead at Florida…..and then conceded 14.

LSU and Alabama got our hearts pumped that we actually felt sorry for the loser.

Anyway, the SEC is back this week with no particular ‘heavyweight’ battles, although everyone seems to be looking forward to seeing how Johnny Manziel will cope with Alabama’s defense – which was actually a lot less of a ‘machine’ in Death Valley.

If you’re listening to music, we guide you Mumford & Sons’ classic “Little Lion Man” , with the great line: “We ****ed it up this time”. It was played outside Tiger Stadium after the Alabama loss, we hear.


After the near-loss at LSU, Alabama comes into this game slightly less favoured that you would think – by 13 1/2 points. That doesn’t mean to say we think they will necessarily lose, but we think the Crimson Tide are going to get all they can handle from a Texas A&M offense that can currently do nothing wrong after going to Cowbell Country and ringing Mississippi State’s bell. Alabama’s secondary, which gave up nearly 300 yards to Zach Mettenberger and looked awful at times, had better be on high alert. This game could be great.

BOTTOM LINE: Alabama gets by, and gets its spot in the SEC Championship Game. Just. Alabama by 7 in a classic. Johnny Football gets more heads turning, before he’s sold down the river by the Aggies.


Georgia struggled in the first half against Ole Miss. They were absolutely terrible. It wasn’t to do with post-Cocktail party cocktails, was it? Well, while Georgia struggled, Auburn made hay. Yes, it was against New Mexico State, but you know what? You gotta win somewhere. Anyway, Georgia’s defense looked like it was living up to its pre-season billing on Saturday, just smothering Bo Wallace and Uncle Reb in the second quarter. And they carry on as they did, Auburn doesn’t have a lot of hope for this one. Jarvis Jones for a Heisman, y’all.

BOTTOM LINE: Georgia – a 16-point favorite in this one – beats the spread, winning by 17.


We’ve been exceptionally nasty about Zach Mettenberger all season long, but boy did he have a good game against Alabama. He suddenly looks like the future. His receivers dropped four balls that they should have held onto in the first half, and although Mettenberger did have a few bad throws, he didn’t nail someone in the stands like we thought he would. Mississippi State on the other hand were slaughtered at home by Texas A&M, obviously suffering from the loss to the Crimson Tide. Or they simply weren’t that good in the first place. Now, MSU goes into Baton Rouge. Ouch.

BOTTOM LINE: LSU wins by 21 in a game over by fourth quarter. Mettenberger again sparkles, stunning many.


South Carolina’s first game without Marcus Lattimore is going to be emotional. Expect a lot of sandstorm love in South Carolina. Now everyone expects South Carolina to win by some margin over the Razorbacks, who are simply treading water until the off-season. But Tyler Wilson and Cobi Hamilton can still cause a defense – even one as good as 13 1/2-point favourite South Carolina’s – a lot of problems. This is going to be closer than many think.

BOTTOM LINE South Carolina wins by 10 in a game not decided until the last 5 minutes.


Missouri stunned many – including Vegas – by sticking around in their game against Florida, only losing out to the Gators 14-7 in a game that won’t be replayed by anybody ever again. Well, this week the ‘Zou go against a nastier offense – Tennessee’s. Tyler Bray can put up the points in bundles – and this UT team – a 3-point favourite – really isn’t as bad as many think they are.

BOTTOM LINE: Tennessee in cruise control, beating the spread and winning by 14.


Two of the SEC’s more snobbish fanbases meet up for chandeliers, champagne and caviar (and a bit of football) on Saturday night. Vanderbilt comes to Oxford having smashed Kentucky 40-0 and helped the Wildcats in their decision to fire Joker Phillips at season’s end, but let’s be honest: Vandy’s been Vandy this year. On the other hand, Ole Miss has been a bit of a positive surprise this year, winning games, leading others, and worrying even more. Bo Wallace is a good quarterback and if the Rebels can find an offensive line on Saturday night, we think they win in a game that they are actually favored in (3 1/2 points).

BOTTOM LINE No Ghosts in Mississippi. Ole Miss wins by 7.


Florida muttered and mumbled through a desperate game against Missouri, where The Swamp became boo-boy central once again and the fanbase began to use words that were less than encouraging. It’s a pity, for such a beautiful fanbase. Anyway, this week’s a chance for Jeff Driskel to stretch his wings, and the Gators to stretch their jaws against a ULL side who are 26 1/2 point underdogs.

BOTTOM LINE Florida by 35.


The days after Armageddon: SEC Rankings (With apologies)

First Alabama – LSU happened.

Then Obama happened.

Sorry boys and gals, we haven’t been as up-to-date as we should be with our SEC rankings. Anyway, here they are…

1. Alabama – Survived LSU. You have to wonder what John Chavis was doing playing soft coverage though in that last drive.

2 = Georgia – Woke up from a 10-0 deficit against Ole Miss to hammer Ole Reb 37-10 in a performance that got stronger by the minute. We look forward to the SEC Championship Game, Dawgs.

2= LSU – A team very like Georgia who only woke up in the second half of the Alabama game. Atmosphere second-to-none in Death Valley, by the way. Good on you, LSU fans.

4. Florida- Sorry for seeming unconvinced by Florida 14, Missouri 7. And don’t tell me that it’s a ‘testament to the power of the SEC’, either. Maybe Jeff Driskel IS overrated.

5. South Carolina – Missing Marcus Lattimore? So are we.

6. Texas A&M – They came, they saw, they conquered Cowbell. The Aggies could frighten Alabama on Saturday afternoon. Or they could implode in the second half, as they have against good teams.

7. Mississippi State – Two good teams, two losses. Just goes to show: Those people who said Dan Mullen’s team was overrated – you were right.

8. Tennessee – If only Tyler Bray had been able to point up these sort of numbers against the likes of Alabama and Florida.

9. Vanderbilt – Beating the crap out of Kentucky shows…..er….nothing.

10. Ole Miss – You taketh 10 points in the Dawg House, and take away 37. Yeowch. However, we’ll go out on a limb and say that we think the Egg Bowl this year is going to be a really good game. And no, we’re not joking.

11. Arkansas – Goodbye, John L.Smith. It was good knowing you. A win versus Tulsa ain’t gonna make us feel any different.

12. Missouri – Courageous loss at Florida, boys. Maybe your defense might be ready for the SEC after all.

13. Auburn – Hey, at least Auburn fans had something to celebrate with the win against New Mexico State. War….(sorry, I’m done now)

14. Kentucky – At last! Goodbye Joker Phillips!


Bama – LSU Prediction: Week 10 Predictions

It’s a busy week, so here’s some quick picks for y’all to get your teeth into….


For a college football romantic like me, there’s no place on earth like LSU’s Tiger Stadium. Some people will die never experiencing it, and for us, their lives will be all the poorer for not doing so. After all, there’s something to be said for drinking bourbon from sunrise to sunset!

And the place – already famed for its loudness – is going to off the hook for the benefit for the visit of top-ranked Alabama and its hated head coach Nick Saban, is ready to give the Crimson Tide everything it can handle. Alabama hasn’t played in this type of nasty night-game atmosphere since it went to Florida and dispatched the Gators last year in a game that was out of hand by the middle of the third quarter.

Having said that, they go to the game eight point favourites in this game, which looks a little high. Having said that, Alabama’s a machine and LSU is not. The Tide rolls up the field and is generally clinical, while LSU’s problem has been – as it has been all season – its offence, and in particular QB Zach Mettenberger, who has struggled all season and long and has shown no signs of real progression. Saturday night wouldn’t be a bad night for a coming out party, Zach….

PREDICTION: Alabama wins by 7 – but don’t surprised if they win by more.


Georgia’s ‘D’ played out of their minds in upsetting Florida last week, and with a home crowd backing them, you worry for Ole Miss – despite Hugh Freeze’s side having won last week at Arkansas, who go into the game at 14-point underdog.

If Georgia’s offense is to click – which it sporadically has done this year – it will have to with QB Aaron Murray NOT connecting with the opposition secondary, as he did numerous times against Florida. Bo Wallace will be trying to keep himself away from Georgia’s NFL-going linebacker Jarvis Jones, who changed the Cocktail Party last week.

This one should be fun – until the third quarter.

PREDICTION: Georgia wins by over 14.


Johnny Football is the most exciting thing to happen to the SEC since, er, the last SEC Championship, and he’ll learn to win big-time games. This game in Cowbell Central against Mississippi State would be a good place to start. Aggies fans will be wishing bars didn’t close at midnight, though.

PREDICTION: Cowbell up! Mississippi State by 7.


As we’ve alluded to in our piece about Georgia earlier, the Gators were pretty well shut out by the Gators last Saturday, turning the ball over and looking generally dysfunctional as a team.

Missouri, however, its first SEC game in its history, beating Kentucky as spawning furious celebration on its campus (most of it relief, we feel).

Anyway, the Tigers go back to reality as they go on the road to Gainseville, where offenses tend to go to die. Especially these Tigers, who aren’t very good and are 17 point underdogs.

PREDICTION: Florida to beat the handicap, winning by 21 against a Missouri side who isn’t that good. At all.


This game – destined to be the ‘SEC Network Game Of The Week’ (or whatever you call it) will feature two sides who haven’t really been very good this season – and this is an understatement. Listen, Kentucky could have pulled off two massive upsets if they’d played for a half against South Carolina and Georgia had played an F – instead of an F, and they aren’t to be sniffed at at home. Big upset here?

PREDICTION: Vandy in a close one, winning by 3.


We’ll put it like this: If ButTchuggers U doesn’t score 40 and win by a wide margin, Derek Dooley shouldn’t be in a job. ‘Nuff said.

PREDICTION: Tennessee wins by 28 in a game that’s pretty fun for the neutrals – and Dooley-haters.


We were sharing a cold one with an Auburn fan and he said: “I think you should pick against Auburn in every game this season”. Well, New Mexico State isn’t very good. Then again, nor is Auburn. What do we say?

PREDICTION: Auburn gets some happy back. Auburn wins by 28.


Dawgs bark, Tide rolls, Gators chomped, Everyone prays: SEC Rankings (Week 9)

It was a horrible week in the SEC.

After Ole Miss tries to recover from the car crash that killed THREE of its students in a car crash, news comes out this weekend that brother and sister both die in a car crash. RIP, Sarah and James Wheat. Prayers are with the Wheat family.

Second, Marcus Lattimore gets a horror show of an injury in South Carolina’s game against Tennessee. You mean, the kid needs MORE HARDSHIP, God? The injury is gruesome. If you really want to see, it, click here (for the record, we haven’t even watched it again). From a football perspective, this deprives South Carolina of a much-needed weapon. From a human perspective, this may well deprive the Lattimore family of their hopes and dreams in the future. Hang in there, Family Lattimore.

Oh, and the football. While Tennessee and South Carolina players prayed for Marcus Lattimore, the Chippy Drunkfest known as the World’s Biggest Outdoor Cocktail Party took place in Jacksonville, where Georgia played less badly than Florida and caused the upset. The game was big for penalties. And interceptions. That’s about it. And in Tuscaloosa, Machine Known As Alabama smote the Cowbell, and things only got worse for Auburn, as they were destroyed. At home. Against Texas A&M. Oh, and Missouri got its first win of its SEC career, defeating the mighty Kentucky. Ole Miss got its second win of the SEC schedule beating Arkansas on a last-minute field goal, and Vanderbilt – as predicted – destroyed U-Mass. Oh, and the fireworks were cool, too.

So here are the rankings – we’re going to go with Fun’s “Some Nights”. WARNING: It’s very catchy and moreish. SECOND WARNING: It’s got Civil War re-enactment. If you’re into that sort of thing.


1) Alabama – The Unstoppable Machine grabbed Mississippi State’s Cowbell and rammed it where the sun doesn’t shine. Nick Saban’s great highlight of the game was going ape at one of his defenders in the first half. Wow. That guy can explode.

2) LSU – We can’t wait for the Alabama- LSU clash in Baton Rouge on Saturday. At night. This is going to be Hurricane Cocktail.

3) Georgia – Jarvis Jones is a freak. In Manti Te’o’s a Heisman candidate, then there’s no reason that The Destroyer shouldn’t be, either. Jones may well be the No.1 NFL Draft pick in 2013, too. Oh, and Malcolm Mitchell gave the team a reason to celebrate on Flag Day.

4) Florida – Lost the Chippy Drunkfest, committing a multitude of turnovers in the process. Jeff Driskel and the Florida offensive line was torched by the Georgia rush (now THAT’s something that you don’t say every week), but they seemed to find a groove when they double-teamed Jarvis Jones. Until Jordan Reed went for six and had the ball punched out by – guess who – Jarvis Jones. And then cried.

5) South Carolina – All prayers to the South Carolina Nation after Marcus Lattimore’s injury. All we can say is that we are sorry.

6) Texas A&M – A&M had their trip to Auburn won when it scored 21 in practically no-time in the first half. Auburn wasn’t coming back. It didn’t. In fact, the Tigers got worse. That kid Johnny Manziel’s good, by the way.

7) Mississippi State – Cowbell’d in Tuscaloosa. There’s not a lot else you can say, apart from that at least our question “Who has Mississippi State played again?” was answered. Emphatically.

8) Ole Miss – Ole Miss’ season might have been one of the more exciting this season. On an emotional night for the Ole Miss Nation (see links above), The Rebs won on a last-second field goal at Arkansas, giving them their second SEC win of the year. They don’t do things easy, by God.

9) Tennessee – This team isn’t as bad as their record suggests. We promise. But that’s not going to help Derek Dooley.

10) Vanderbilt – They won. They hammered U-Mass. They finished homecoming with some cool fireworks. Ooh. Aah.

11) Arkansas – Did things the hard way and we really thought the Razorbacks would pull this one out. They didn’t, losing in a heartbreaker. Still, Tyler Wilson and Cobi Hamilton look like NFL Draft Picks, don’t they?

12) Missouri – Victory against Kentucky guarantees that they aren’t the worst team in the SEC East this year. Only one of them.

13) Kentucky – We can now unequivocally say two things: Kentucky isn’t the worst team in the SEC (that’s Auburn). And Joker Phillips is going to get fired at the end of the season.

14) Auburn – We can now unequivocally say two things: Auburn is the worst team in the SEC. And Gene Chizik should get fired at the end of the season. Could this team actually lose to 1-7 New Mexico State next week?



As Gators chomp, Aggies get ‘Les Miles-ed’ and Tide Roll – Week 8 SEC Rankings

We would go on and on about Steve Spurrier getting Spurrier-ed in The Swamp, Texas A&M finding out what it’s like when you don’t put away a team led by Les Miles, and how awful Georgia was at Kentucky, but we’ll let the rankings reflect our rambling thoughts.

1) Alabama – Darth Saban’s Crimson Death Star is blowing up every rebel ship in its way. This team seems to make no mistakes and is happy to simply crush the opposition – as Tennessee found out in a 31-point blow-out. And the women love it!!!

2) Florida – Will Muschamp’s side gets the turnovers, and then punishes those making the mistakes savagely and without mercy. The eternal sound on CBS on the ‘Gator Chomp’ was more than a little bit annoying, but when the chant’s led by lovely Gator co-eds and cheerleaders, we didn’t complain too much. There will be a lot of chomping at the Cocktail Party, folks. Oh, and we hate this guy…..

3) LSU – Were outplayed in the first half, but still came out with a 14-12 lead. Taught Texas A&M the true value of not turning the ball over (the Aggies had FIVE turnovers), and running the ball (219 yards rushing – with Jeremy Hill leading the way with an excellent 47-yard icer). But their problem is still Zach Mettenberger, who was 11-for-29 for 97 yards, 1 TD, and 417 overthrows. In fact, Tracy Wolfson should watch out when she’s on the sideline for the Alabama game. She might get hurt. Like this NFL reporter almost did.

4) South Carolina – Three words we don’t usually use for Steve Spurrier: “Hammered. Hurt. Humiliated.” All three apply to his teams (well, the offense and the special teams, anyway!) after their adventure at The Swamp.

5) Mississippi State- Dan Mullen’s are unbeaten. Next stop for the Cowbell-ers…Alabama. We have ‘Bama as a 21-point favorite, by the way. We think the Bulldogs are pretty good, but Alabama is a class above.

6) Georgia – The Bulldogs were absolutely dreadful in their win over Kentucky. There’s no other way of saying them. Unless miracles happen between now and 3.30pm next Saturday, the smell of barbecue after the game won’t be Gator, it’ll be Dawg.

7) Texas A&M – This is a free lesson for you, Johnny Football: TURNOVERS WILL KILL YOU. NO MATTER IF YOU’RE SUPERMAN. I’m sure you know this, but we wanted to point this out again. And again. And again. By the way, the atmosphere in Kyle Field was off the hook. The ending of the game was pretty cool, though…

8) Ole Miss – Did nothing but didn’t get blown out by Alabama. Tennessee did. Ergo, they rise about Tennessee in the rankings.

9) Tennessee – Dear Smokey, can you and Lassie go and find the Volunteers some heart? It seems to have left Neyland Stadium and gone elsewhere. Quite possibly wearing orange pants, and has a sour taste in its mouth. Possibly because of getting beaten by Alabama….again.

10) Arkansas – The Razorbacks are top of the ‘pile’ (we won’t go into details, but you can probably guess), simply because their offense might actually save their defense this year. We’ll see in the Ole Miss game, which is actually bigger than a lot of people expect – as both sides are gunning for bowl eligibility (especially with the last three games for the Hogs being South Carolina, MSU and LSU).

11) Vanderbilt – We thought this year that the Commodores might be the second-worst team in the SEC East. We were wrong. They are the third-worst.

12) Missouri – The Tigers might find out how bad they actually are when they play the  ‘S***ty Showdown’ against Kentucky on Saturday. Coming to you at 12.21pm on exclusively SEC Network! Yaaaaaay!

13) Kentucky – Played well against Georgia, but couldn’t come up with the goods. Some dumb penalties in the fourth quarter didn’t help, either. There’s a future with this team, but it probably won’t involve Joker Phillips after this year. So Wildcats fans hope.

14) Auburn – In Auburn, Alabama, a pastor was preaching about the Tigers, the 2012 season, and the future of Gene Chizik. He had only two words: “Dear God…..” And  he then stopped. He didn’t need to continue. Everyone got the picture.

Gators, Tide, Tigers chomping at the bit: 8 Things About the SEC After Week 8

1) Well, South Carolina got a fine lesson in not turning the ball over, didn’t they? The Gamecocks had four turnovers, and were punished for each one. Heck, they were punished for everything else they did badly, too by the Gators and tens of thousands of Gator fans chomping at the bit for more.

2) As for Texas A&M – another game with a fantastic atmosphere – Kyle Field learned what it’s like to be Les Miles-ed, where your team outplays the Tigers for half-a-game only to go in at the break losing and then being smashmouthed by defense and running backs for the second. LSU wasn’t great in Aggieland, but sometimes, it’s better to be lucky than great – especially if your quarterback’s Zach Mettenberger. The guy needs non-stop lessons about not overthrowing his receiver.  Oh, and A&M went back to its old self of giving up a double-digit lead.

3) We don’t know if they were looking towards Jacksonville, but Georgia was dreadful against Kentucky on Sunday night. They were unable to run the ball or throw it particularly well, and we saw nothing that makes us think that the Dawgs – which suddenly are in the driver’s seat in the SEC East (if they beat Florida and don’t, er, play like Georgia has been throughout 2012) – will beat Florida, and everything to think that Mike Gillislee could put up 150 yards on his own on Saturday.

4) Kentucky: Where have you been this season? Your team played with heart, courage and some defense! Why did Joker Phillips wait until now to get his team up for the challenge? Wildcats fans: There is a future. It might not be in Atlanta anytime soon (unless you want to play a season opener in the Georgia Dome), but you know what, this suddenly didn’t become a dreadful side. Unless, of course, Georgia really were that bad…

5) Johnny Manziel: Some runs got the heart racing. This player is going to be God in Aggieland for years to come. In a place that loves its heroes, this could be the biggest since The Bear. But for crying out loud, the turnovers are going to kill him – as they did against LSU, and he has to learn that he can’t do everything.

6) We dubbed Vanderbilt and Auburn the ‘Car Crash Bowl’, because watching the game was distinctly uncomfortable and we felt genuinely like going to church and apologizing to God for watching it. It was absolutely horrific. Vandy won, by the way. Auburn’s stretch of losing to teams it doesn’t usually lose to continues. I bet the Tigers fans can’t wait for their drubbing in the Iron Bowl. Oh, and congratulations to Zac Stacy for being Vandy’s top running back in the school’s history. Nice one. He even got a touchdown for the pleasure…..Auburn didn’t seem to want to tackle him.

7) Tennessee looked OK in the first half against Alabama, only trailing by 10 at half time. Then, Tennessee – and in particular Tyler Bray (who threw 2 picks and overthrew his receivers) made the mistakes and Alabama capitalised, and Darth Saban’s Death Star  rolls on. Is there any team that can beat the Crimson Tide this year?


Back to 2012: Week 8 SEC Predictions

Now that the SEC schedule for 2013’s arrived, Christmas has descended early on the Southland and now we’re virtually ignoring what is still a gangbusters 2012 for the conference.

Alabama and Florida were named your BCS No. 1 and No.2 – although that won’t be the National Championship Game unless all hell breaks loose on the schedule.

Anyway, here are our predictions for this week.

And the soundtrack? We’re going with the Drive By Truckers’ ‘Kings Of The South’, from their incredible album ‘Southern Rock Opera’. It’s a beautiful thing….

So here we go….


If we believe Steve Spurrier, Marcus Lattimore and virtually the whole Gamecocks side is out of the game with bruises, cuts, or rabies. But while half of us wants to believe the Ole Ball Coach, the other half thinks it’s a bit of a smokescreen after the 23-21 loss at LSU where the Gamecocks were outclassed in the boiling pot known as Tiger Stadium. As for Florida, they woke up in the fourth quarter against Vanderbilt, but the Gators were poor. Having said that, Jeff Driskell’s still breaking games open, and if South Carolina is as ill and injured as they say, then they are going to struggle with his speed (as well as that of Mike Gillislee, who should be considered for a Heisman right now). Oh, and the game’s going to be The Swamp, where old fans of the 4-point favored Gators will respect Steve Spurrier, but the young ones won’t be so friendly. It’s going to be one hell of an atmosphere – even for 3.30 in the afternoon.

BOTTOM LINE: With South Carolina’s injuries, Florida gets a jump on South Carolina and never lets go. Florida by 7. Of course, if you believe Steve Spurrier.


Some people are really ****ed off that this game’s on at 12.30 (11.30 Texas time), but not us: It means we get to watch a good match-up all the way through the day (Well, until the first quarter of Alabama vs Tennessee’s over, anyway!). Field goal-favorite LSU knows what it’s going up against: A very, very loud crowd, male cheerleaders, and some guy called Johnny Football, who’s thrown for 1,600 yards and run for nearly 700 more. He’s the second coming of Aggie Jesus. LSU was great against the run last week, but can they do the same after a game like that?

BOTTOM LINE: LSU wins by 7 in a game that goes down to the wire. Johnny Football plays well though.


We just have this to say: Tennessee sure knew how to make 20-point favorite Alabama angry when they decided that this game – of all games in the 2012 season – would be the one to honor the man that Crimson Tide fans despise the most: Phil Fulmer. Vegas should have moved the line on this one, because we think that it’ll prompt Nick Saban will try and go for it in the third quarter – even when the game’s out of hand and Neyland’s empty. But it should be a fantastic atmosphere before the game – even though tickets are going from just $50. And there’s really not a bad seat in Neyland, friends. Oh, and the rumors are untrue that instead of pledging (which they are no longer allowed to do in Tuscaloosa), Alabama frats are simply making their guys sit in front of the TV and watch all four quarters of this one – which will be a struggle, even for a Tide fan.

BOTTOM LINE: Alabama out of sight. Crimson Tide by 27.


We really enjoy listening to Al.com’s Auburn podcasts, and this one’s not any different. However, the Auburn fans seem to be misguided if they think that Auburn’s going to turn it around from the mess that they are already in. The quarterback situation is nothing less than terrible. The team can’t seem to play for four quarters (see Ole Miss for details). People want Gene Chizik out. And 7-point favorite Vanderbilt – despite being rather disappointing this year – aren’t really that great either, but Jordan Rodgers & Co can really pull this off and call this a scalp!

BOTTOM LINE: Vanderbilt wins by 10. That’s how bad we think Auburn is.


If there’s one team more awful than Auburn this season, it’s Kentucky – but unfortunately for us all, Auburn and Kentucky aren’t playing each other this year, so we can’t have three hours of train crash on Jefferson Sports Pilot (or whatever it’s called now) to laugh. Because believe us, it would provide the hilarity. And while it seems that the knives are already out for Joker Phillips (if you believe everybody, Joker Phillips is going to be following John L. Smith out the door quickly), people are sharpening them for Mark Richt – particularly after the Bulldogs’ abysmal performance at South Carolina, when they were hit by a few Spurrier haymakers in the first quarter and simply couldn’t get up. If 27-point favorite Georgia doesn’t perform exceptionally – and we mean win by at least four or five touchdowns – Athens may well get sacked (check out me and my classic Greek references!!)

BOTTOM LINE: Georgia storms back, winning by 40. Doesn’t win any friends with the BCS though – even with South Carolina losing.


Ready for our prediction? Really ready? We think Mississippi State’s going to win easily! There you go!

BOTTOM LINE: CLANG! CLANG! CLANG! Cowbell ring a lot as Mississippi State runs wild, wining by 28.

SEC releases 2013 Football schedule

It’s Christmas come early for SEC fans. The 2013’s schedule is out!

Aug. 31

Ole Miss at Vanderbilt


Sept. 7

South Carolina at Georgia


Sept. 14

Alabama at Texas A&M

Mississippi State at Auburn

Vanderbilt at South Carolina


Sept. 21

Auburn at LSU

Tennessee at Florida


Sept. 28

Ole Miss at Alabama

Texas A&M at Arkansas

Florida at Kentucky

LSU at Georgia


Oct. 5

Arkansas at Florida

Ole Miss at Auburn

Georgia at Tennessee

Kentucky at South Carolina

LSU at Mississippi State

Missouri at Vanderbilt


Oct. 12

Alabama at Kentucky

South Carolina at Arkansas

Florida at LSU

Missouri at Georgia

Texas A&M at Ole Miss


Oct. 19

Arkansas at Alabama

Auburn at Texas A&M

Florida at Missouri

Georgia at Vanderbilt

South Carolina at Tennessee

LSU at Ole Miss


Oct. 26

Tennessee at Alabama

Kentucky at Mississippi State

South Carolina at Missouri

Vanderbilt at Texas A&M


Nov. 2

Auburn at Arkansas

Georgia vs. Florida (Jacksonville)

Mississippi State at South Carolina

Tennessee at Missouri


Nov. 9

LSU at Alabama

Arkansas at Ole Miss

Auburn at Tennessee

Vanderbilt at Florida

Missouri at Kentucky

Mississippi State at Texas A&M


Nov. 16

Alabama at Mississippi State

Georgia at Auburn

Florida at South Carolina

Kentucky at Vanderbilt


Nov. 23

Mississippi State at Arkansas

Kentucky at Georgia

Texas A&M at LSU

Missouri at Ole Miss

Vanderbilt at Tennessee


Nov. 30

Alabama at Auburn

Arkansas at LSU

Tennessee at Kentucky

Ole Miss at Mississippi State

Texas A&M at Missouri


* – Saturday dates listed / Subject to change based on television selections


2013 SEC Football Schedule (Conference Games Only)






Sept. 14                 at Texas A&M

Sept. 28                 OLE MISS

Oct. 12                   at Kentucky

Oct. 19                   ARKANSAS

Oct. 26                   TENNESSEE

Nov. 9                     LSU

Nov. 16                  at Mississippi State

Nov. 30                  at Auburn



Sept. 28                 TEXAS A&M

Oct. 5                     at Florida

Oct. 12                   SOUTH CAROLINA

Oct. 19                   at Alabama

Nov. 2                     AUBURN

Nov. 9                     at Ole Miss

Nov. 23                  MISSISSIPPI STATE

Nov. 30                  at LSU



Sept. 14                 MISSISSIPPI STATE

Sept. 21                 at LSU

Oct. 5                     OLE MISS

Oct. 19                   at Texas A&M

Nov. 2                     at Arkansas

Nov. 9                     at Tennessee

Nov. 16                  GEORGIA

Nov. 30                  ALABAMA



Sept. 21                 TENNESSEE

Sept. 28                 at Kentucky

Oct. 5                     ARKANSAS

Oct. 12                   at LSU

Oct. 19                   at Missouri

Nov. 2                     vs. Georgia (Jacksonville)

Nov. 9                     VANDERBILT

Nov. 16                  at South Carolina



Sept. 7                    SOUTH CAROLINA

Sept. 28                 LSU

Oct. 5                     at Tennessee

Oct. 12                   MISSOURI

Oct. 19                   at Vanderbilt

Nov. 2                     vs. Florida (Jacksonville)

Nov. 16                  at Auburn

Nov. 23                  KENTUCKY




Sept. 28                 FLORIDA

Oct. 5                     at South Carolina

Oct. 12                   ALABAMA

Oct. 26                   at Mississippi State

Nov. 9                     MISSOURI

Nov. 16                  at Vanderbilt

Nov. 23                  at Georgia

Nov. 30                  TENNESSEE



Sept. 21                 AUBURN

Sept. 28                 at Georgia

Oct. 5                     at Mississippi State

Oct. 12                   FLORIDA

Oct. 19                   at Ole Miss

Nov. 9                     at Alabama

Nov. 23                  TEXAS A&M

Nov. 30                  ARKANSAS



Aug. 31                  at Vanderbilt

Sept. 28                 at Alabama

Oct. 5                     at Auburn

Oct. 12                   TEXAS A&M

Oct. 19                   LSU

Nov. 9                     ARKANSAS

Nov. 23                  MISSOURI

Nov. 30                  at Mississippi State



Sept. 14                 at Auburn

Oct. 5                     LSU

Oct. 26                   KENTUCKY

Nov. 2                     at South Carolina

Nov. 9                     at Texas A&M

Nov. 16                  ALABAMA

Nov. 23                  at Arkansas

Nov. 30                  OLE MISS



Oct. 5                     at Vanderbilt

Oct. 12                   at Georgia

Oct. 19                   FLORIDA

Oct. 26                   SOUTH CAROLINA

Nov. 2                     TENNESSEE

Nov. 9                     at Kentucky

Nov. 23                  at Ole Miss

Nov. 30                  TEXAS A&M



Sept. 7                    at Georgia

Sept. 14                 VANDERBILT

Oct. 5                     KENTUCKY

Oct. 12                   at Arkansas

Oct. 19                   at Tennessee

Oct. 26                   at Missouri

Nov. 2                     MISSISSIPPI STATE

Nov. 16                  FLORIDA



Sept. 21                 at Florida

Oct. 5                     GEORGIA

Oct. 19                   SOUTH CAROLINA

Oct. 26                   at Alabama

Nov. 2                     at Missouri

Nov. 9                     AUBURN

Nov. 23                  VANDERBILT

Nov. 30                  at Kentucky



Sept. 14                 ALABAMA

Sept. 28                 at Arkansas

Oct. 12                   at Ole Miss

Oct. 19                   AUBURN

Oct. 26                   VANDERBILT

Nov. 9                     MISSISSIPPI STATE

Nov. 23                  at LSU

Nov. 30                  at Missouri



Aug. 31                  OLE MISS

Sept. 14                 at South Carolina

Oct. 5                     MISSOURI

Oct. 19                   GEORGIA

Oct. 26                   at Texas A&M

Nov. 9                     at Florida

Nov. 16                  KENTUCKY

Nov. 23                  at Tennessee

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