SEC Week 6: Hurricanes, bad names, and long-ass games
The only thing anyone was talking about this weekend was the fact that the LSU-Florida game got ‘postponed’ because of Hurricane Matthew and never may see the light of day again, which could lead to quite a ruckus in the SEC Standings – especially in the SEC West. Both ADs Joe Alleva (LSU) and Jeremy Foley (Florida) and SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey have made complete asses of themselves in all of this, and Sankey showed no backbone whatsoever.
Now, back to football: College Gameday’s ‘crowd’ at the start of ESPN’s 3-hour college football preview might as well have been The 1/12th Man, bearing in mind how small the crowd was, but it grew larger as the day wore on. I still want to punch the scheduler in the face for bring on The Chainsmokers, who showed no knowledge about the sport, but were able to pimp their buddies and a shoe company. The game itself was a 5-hour epic, not helped by the fact there were a ton of injury time-outs, it went to double over-time, and CBS had to have 164 EXTRA ****ING COMMERCIAL BREAKS. Of course, Clay Travis liked to blame the bands and the fact that they played for 40 minutes at half-time, but then again, it’s Clay Travis. I leave it at that.
Elsewhere in SEC Country, we learned – if we hadn’t already – that Arkansas doesn’t have a defense, Mississippi State without Dak Prescott is an abomination, Georgia’s offensive line really isn’t that bad (or is South Carolina’s terrible?), South Carolina’s got an awful offense, and Alabama is really, really scary on offense.
So here are your rankings:
- Alabama (6-0): Nick Saban had another Napoleon-like tantrum when it became plainly obvious to anyone watching that his defense couldn’t stop Arkansas. But when your offense is up by three touchdowns to start the game off, it doesn’t really matter. Alabama has its starting QB for the next 3 (or 4) years, so other applicants should look elsewhere.
- Texas A&M (6-0): Texas A&M blew a huge lead, couldn’t convert 7 turnovers, missed a 37-yard field goal with time running out in hilarious fashion, and still came out victors against Tennessee. Now who’s the lucky ones? John Chavis was right to say that there are things to be learned on the defensive side of the ball. Stopping a running back might be one of them.
- Ole Miss (3-2): I’m dropping Tennessee down a place despite them taking Texas A&M to two overtimes on the road despite seven turnovers and a bunch of injuries? Yes. And here’s why: If Ole Miss and Tennessee played each other, I’m not sure Tennessee could stop Ole Miss. It would end up 70-69, though.
- Tennessee (5-1): This team can’t play two halves of football. But Good Lord those comebacks are fun to watch.
- Auburn (4-2): We know it seems this is pretty high for Malzahn’s team, but his defense is GOOD.
- LSU (3-2): Yeah…so Arkansas was that bad against Alabama.
- Florida (4-1): Yeah….so Arkansas was that bad against Alabama.
- Georgia (3-3): The good news: Nick Chubb was healthy. Sony Michel was healthy. The O-Line looked OK. Isaiah McKenzie is fun. The bad news: Jacob Eason is borderline erratic.
- Arkansas (4-2): Bret Bielema’s has no defense. After the TCU game, I think that was established. What is now concerning, is that Arkansas has no offensive line, either. The biggest star of the game was Arkansas Agriculture professor Dr. Lawton Lanier Nalley, who screamed at Bielema: “If I had your record, I would be ****ing fired. **** you!”. He was arrested. Would he be right? Probably not, but if Arkansas ends this season 5-7 – which it could quite easily do, the seat could be warming. Apparently Mr. Nalley was drunk. Well I never.
- Missouri (2-3): The guys at Mizzodcast – the best podcast around (in our humble opinion) for a SEC Team, are probably convinced that the bye week saved them a loss. I still think they are better than one SEC West team.
- Mississippi State (2-3): I watched Mississippi State this week get CRUSHED by Auburn, and I become more convinced that Dak Prescott was the only reason Dan Mullen looked like a good coach.
- Kentucky (3-3): Beat Vanderbilt in a horrible game, and convinced nobody.
- South Carolina (2-4): Lost to Kentucky, and the offense downright stinks.
- Vanderbilt (2-4): At the end of the season, Vanderbilt should fire Derek Mason or ask him if he wants to be the defensive co-ordinator. I’m not sure he’s got the hand of the offensive side of it.