It’s that time of the year when people talk. They talk about recruits. They talk about titles. And they talk about whether head coaches are going to get booted at the end of the season. Did Will Muschamp save his job by beating Georgia decisively at the Cocktail Party? Did Georgia’s Mark Richt endanger by losing the same game? Has Texas A&M’s run of form endangered Kevin Sumlin’s?

Anyway, here you go with our SEC Head Coaches On The Hot Seat. Note that the lower you get, it slowly becomes very unlikely indeed.

1) Will Muschamp (Florida)

— Despite beating Georgia so decisively, Will Muschamp’s reign has been pretty horrible in Florida (26-19) – especially if you compare it to the God that was Urban Meyer. With the school floundering in the recruiting ranks (not that we take it seriously), and the school floundering offensively as well (we blame the stubborn and persistent efforts to put in Jeff Driskel), Muschamp’s behind is still tanned from the heat he’s feeling right now. If not burnt off.

2) Steve Spurrier (South Carolina)

South Carolina came into the season as a dark horse for a play-off spot, and on Opening Night, they fell to pieces against Texas A&M. And although one upside has been a victory against Georgia, the losses against (deep breath) Kentucky and Tennessee certainly have pissed the fanbase off to such an extent that the media that used to love HBC are suddenly starting to ask for his head. This could end as soon as Clemson, folks.

3) Derek Mason (Vanderbilt)

Vanderbilt’s a tire fire and has been a tire fire ever since James Franklin left it. And it’s been worse – much worse- than imagined. Vanderbilt has barely competed in any SEC games, let alone played them. The wins against lower opposition like Charleston Southern have been a struggle. The words “Out of his depth” don’t even come close to what people are thinking about Derek Mason. They are thinking worse. Much worse. We would not be surprised if the Commodores boot him this year and start afresh.

4) Mark Richt (Georgia)

This year (as usual) Mark Richt and Georgia was expected to challenge for a play-off place. Before the season started, Richt had to boot most of his secondary as well as a some other key players off the team for their own mistakes, and during the season Todd Gurley, the God-like running back, was suspended. They took the lead against Florida….and then were eviscerated. Such a loss – coupled with the loss at South Carolina (and look where South Carolina is now), got certain parts of the media and the fanbase screaming for a head. Namely his, and his offensive co-ordinator Mike Bobo.

5) Kevin Sumlin (Texas A&M)

Kevin Sumlin’s choice to rule the world from afar seems to have taken a bit of an ass-kicking in recent weeks, as the Aggies have fallen a long, long way from their excellent performance on the road at South Carolina on Opening Day. Kenny Hill is suddenly killed Kenny, the defense can’t tackle worth a crap, and the wide receivers can’t catch. While the Gods at A&M probably won’t fire Sumlin after two years of God-like Johnny Football, Aggies fans will be hoping they at least fire Mark Snyder, his defensive co-ordinator. And possibly the offensive co-ordinator Jake Spavital.

6) Bret Bielema (Arkansas)

Arkansas may be one of the most improved teams in college football, but they still have an 0-fer in the SEC and not only that, seem to be losing every game by committing the same old crappy errors. OK, so if they don’t fire Bielema (which the Razorbacks probably won’t bearing in mind that Jeff Long’s got other things to think about and that Arkansas is definitely on an upward curve at the moment), then they should at least can Rory Segrest, the team’s special teams co-ordinator/defensive line coach. Segrest should either concentrate on one job or go from them both.

7) Les Miles (LSU)

The greatest fun about LSU is that after they were destroyed against Auburn, people started to ask questions about whether the Tigers’ problems stemmed from high graduation to the NFL over the last two years, or Les Miles. A lot of people have nominated for both – particularly in the face of the success of other SEC West schools. The win against Ole Miss actually should have been a loss in Death Valley (thanks, Bo Wallace!). And while Les Miles ALWAYS provides an awesome soundbite, our big problem is less Les Miles (OK, we HATED what he did with the whole Jeremy Hill situation in 2013) and more John Chavis, his defensive co-ordinator. No LSU player over the last couple of years (yes, even the talented ones) have been able to tackle. And if they lose like they did last year against Alabama, the haters are going to hate both of them.

8) Gary Pinkel (Missouri)

This was never going to be Gary Pinkel’s easiest season after guiding them to the SEC Championship Game in 2013 – particularly after the amount of talent he lost to the NFL, graduation, and because Dorial Green-Beckham is a nasty piece of work (Bob Stoops doesn’t care). But the offense hasn’t just been lousy. It’s been horrific. A dumbass will quote you the 42 points that Missouri put on Florida. Someone who watched the game will quote a bunch of defensive touchdowns. And while we’d be SHOCKED if Pinkel was fired, we wouldn’t be if Josh Henson, Pinkel’s offensive co-ordinator is fired. In fact, he should be.

9) Butch Jones (Tennessee)

One SEC win this year and constant excuse-making about a young team will be fine for a year, but if Josh Dobbs gets injured/arrested/falls to pieces mentally (and the offensive line does the same) everyone will once again be asking questions about whether Jones was the right hire in the first place, and whether he’s got the stones to handle the war zone known as the SEC.

10) Mark Stoops (Kentucky)

The fact that LSU beat the crap out of Kentucky shouldn’t take away from the fact that the Wildcats has two SEC victories under its belt for the first time in years (well, since 2011), had the chances to beat Florida in 3 OTs in The Swamp (some might say the refs helped on that one), and gave Mississippi State the fright of its life a couple of weeks ago. Stoops has got Kentucky going in the right direction, which is good….for a basketball and horse racing school. Stoops’ biggest job this year may be keeping his staff.

11) Nick Saban (Alabama)

Three straight losses to highly-ranked teams (Auburn, Oklahoma, Ole Miss) and a close win over Arkansas had tongues wagging as to whether Nick Saban might be fingering retirement, and the possibility that Lane Kiffin might take over the spot (for all you Alabama haters, you WANT this to happen), but a destruction of Texas A&M and Tennessee has gotten the locals happy again. For now. Don’t be surprised if Saban’s DC, Kirby Smart leaves….potentially for the Georgia job if Mark Richt goes.

12) Hugh Freeze (Ole Miss)

We love the Alabama win, the Jesus heart, and the all-round goodguyness of Hugh Freeze. Who doesn’t? He’s also a great recruiter. But his offense in 2014 has been pretty awful all season long, and with the injuries, we can only see Ole Miss’ season becoming one big dumpster fire as it goes on. Look, “hot” is a little over-exaggerated for Hugh Freeze’s seat right now, but if they go back to being Ole Miss in a hurry, Rebels fans may well start asking questions. You know, because they are sooooooo used to success down there.

13) Gus Malzahn (Auburn)

God help Gus Malzahn if luck catches up with him. He’s had a lot of it in two years. Or is that skill? Or a bit of both? (Brainfart!)

14) Dan Mullen (Mississippi State)

Mississippi State is unbeaten and No.1. Mullen’s seat is notsomuch “hot” as “in demand”, which will mean one thing: A bigger deal for Dan come the off-season.

 

 

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