Archive for October, 2014

Can Ole Miss rebound to beat Auburn? Will Georgia win the Cocktail Party? SEC Week 10 Preview

If someone told you at the start of the year that the Ole Miss versus Auburn game would be the biggest game of the football season to date, they’d send you back to the crackhouse with Toronto Mayor Rob Ford.

But it’s true: War Eagle’s visit to The Grove will represent the clash of two of the four teams in the College Football Play-Off Committee (Auburn was voted No.3 and Ole Miss No.4), with the loser seemingly going to get booted out of contention. College Gameday, after visiting SEC schools – including two Missisippi schools- three times in four weeks – has decided to go up to Morgantown for the TCU’s visit of West Virginia. We hope they’ve brought their kevlar.

Oh, and there’s a Cocktail Party (sorry, Todd Gurley will NOT be playing), No.1 Mississippi State (seriously, we STILL can’t believe we’re saying that!!) hosts an Arkansas side that’s seriously better than its 4-4, 0-for-SEC record indicates, and Tennessee goes to South Carolina. Mizzou hosts Kentucky, and Texas A&M plays mighty Louisana-Monroe. Oh, and Vanderbilt plays Old Dominion….and is only a 7-point favorite!! (Giggle!).

Anyway, here’s your preview…

No.3 Auburn (6-1, 3-1) at No. 4 Ole Miss (7-1, 4-1)

“Good Bo? Bad Bo? Bo Wallace! What the **** were you thinking throwing that in Death Valley on Saturday! What were you thinking? Are you ****ing insane? Were you drunk?” Ole Miss fans said – we think – after watching Ole Miss’ stunning 10-7 defeat to LSU at Tiger Stadium on Saturday night. They SHOULD have at least taken the game to overtime, but failed due to some terrible decision-making from their quarterback. Listen, we KNEW that the offense was awful, but we never knew how much. Ole Miss is now going to have to stand up against the buzzsaw that is the Auburn offense, which hasn’t really been slowed down this season (even by Mississippi State, who they put up 23 points against), and probably won’t be, unless Gus is taken to the great War Eagle in the sky. It’s going to be riveting, watching the battle between Gus Offense (15th in the nation at 39.3 points per game) and Hugh Freeze defense (1st in the nation at around 10 points per game). Robert Nkemdiche, Laremy Tunsil and Cody Prewitt were hurt against LSU, and they might be pretty gimpy for this one. And Ole Miss is going to need all the help it can get.

PREDICTION: Ole Miss is a 2-point favorite. We’re taking Auburn by 7 in The Game Of The Year So Far. Here’s why: We don’t believe Ole Miss can score enough points for its beaten-up defense to defend. 

No. 11 Georgia (6-1, 4-1) vs Florida (3-3, 2-3) (Jacksonville)

A Georgia buddy of mine said to me drunkenly at a wedding in July that the team he feared in the run for the SEC East in Florida. “I hate those bastards”, he said to me, while sipping on his bourbon outside a bar in Atlanta, “But those guys can play some defense. Stack the box against Gurley, Mason’s got problems.” Of course, this was before “GurleyGate”, which means that Florida’s ‘D’ is going to be facing Nick Chubb instead of Gurley, who got his ass suspended for four games for getting paid for $3,000 worth of autographs. And my buddy never thought that Florida’s offense would be that lousy…but it is. Jeff Driskel is having a tirefire, and it’s likely that Will Muschamp – who’s the most hated man in The Swamp since Ron Zook –  is going to be Brady Hoke’d at the end of the  year. If Muschamp’s NOT fired by Florida, we’d want Nick Foley to replace Jeremy Foley. Georgia’s on a high after beat Missouri and Arkansas comfortably, but they shouldn’t take Florida too lightly. The Gators’ defense is still really, really good – including the exceptional Vernon Hargreaves, who’s going to be everywhere in the secondary.

Added point: Both sides will be wearing home colors – which we hope is a trend that continues.

Another added point: We hope Verne and Gary are so pissed about having to come to this game instead of the mouthwatering game in The Grove that they complain. A lot.

PREDICTION: Georgia’s a 12-1/2 point favorite. That’s too high. Georgia to win by 10 in a game that’s close until mid-4th.

Arkansas (4-4, 0-4) at No.1 Mississippi State (7-0, 4-0)

Mississippi State didn’t impress us on their trip to Kentucky, but came away with the win, while Arkansas put smiles on Hogs’ fans faces with a victory – albeit over UAB instead of a SEC opponent. Bret Bielema’s team can’t seem to get over the line in the SEC (I feel we’ve said this before), and they struggle because they make too many mistakes and Brandon Allen’s not a good enough quarterback to get them out of the 3rd-and-longs. We love Alex Collins and Jonathan Williams though – and we still reckon they are one the best running back duos in the SEC (although we’ve got so much damned choice!). Anyway, Dak Prescott, wearing maroon, can certainly perform, and that – and a bowling ball runner in Josh Robinson – is the big reason why the Cowbellers are No.1 in the nation right now.

PREDICTION: Mississippi State’s a 10-1/2 point favorite. We think they’ll win by 17. This isn’t going to be that close, people.

Tennessee (3-5, 0-4) at South Carolina (4-4, 2-4) 

Before the Auburn game, it was thought that South Carolina would be hung at Toomer’s Corner after their trip to Jordan-Hare, but it wasn’t to be. South Carolina’s offense exploded….but Auburn’s exploded a little more (and got a ref’s decision – or was it no decision – at the end of the game), and came away with the 7 point victory. Anyway, Tennessee’s coming to Columbia this weekend, and they are just terrible. After getting ripped by Ole Miss and Tennessee (and they were poor for both of those games), Vols fans have got their heads in the hands. But South Carolina will looking for revenge: They lost at Neyland in 2013, a result which was maybe the funniest of the 2013 season.

PREDICTION: South Carolina gets its revenge over the Vols, beating the 7-point spread by 10.

Kentucky (5-3, 2-3) vs Missouri (6-2, 3-1)

The last time Kentucky went on the road to ‘prove’ itself, they were RUINED by LSU. Although they rebounded nicely to give Mississippi State the fright of its life last Saturday, the worry about the last game they played against Tigers must be a little fresh on their minds. They should be OK. Missouri’s offense is probably one of the biggest let-downs of the season so far (REMEMBER: THEY SCORED 42 POINTS AT FLORIDA BECAUSE OF THEIR DEFENSE). Missouri’s a 7-1/2 point favorite.

PREDICTION: Kentucky wins on the road. By 3. 

Louisiana-Monroe (3-4, 0-3) at Texas A&M (5-3, 2-1)

This could be fun, bearing in mind both teams’ shitty defenses. A&M’s a 33-point favorite. And please Texas A&M, fire Mark Snyder.

PREDICTION: Aggies by 41 and beat the spread. Everything’s a bit happier at Kyle Field. 

Old Dominion (3-5, 1-3) at Vanderbilt (2-6, 2-3)

There’s good reason why Vanderbilt has had horrible crowds: They are horrible. They’ve struggled in just about every game they’ve played, and the two wins were against weak non-conference competition. They actually gave the admittedly dreadful Missouri a pretty good battle last Saturday, losing by 10 in a game where QB Jonny McCrary seemed to have found his feet a bit, going 17-31 for 196 yards and 2 TDs . As for Old Dominion, they are on a four-game losing streak, and in their last game gave up 66 points (they only lost by 15). Listen, the OGs from O.D. can score points (they average 33rd), but they are 121st (40th) in points given up. If Vandy can’t score 30 against these guys, Derek Mason should be fired on the spot.

PREDICTION: Vandy – who is hilariously just a 7 point favorite – wins by 14. And it’s pretty comfortable. In the 4th quarter.


Gurley suspended additional two games; Georgia to appeal

Star Georgia running back Todd Gurley has been suspended an extra two games by the NCAA – meaning that he’ll be back for the Auburn game at Sanford Stadium on November 15th.

Georgia already suspended Gurley for two games – the road wins against Arkansas and Missouri – after finding out he had taken money for signing autographs. It was thought to be around the $400 mark, but the further investigation found that it was far more than that.

The NCAA said that Gurley was suspended for “accepting more than $3,000 in cash from multiple individuals for autographed memorabilia and other items over two years.” It added that “Gurley, who acknowledged violating NCAA rules, must repay a portion of the money received to a charity of his choice and complete 40 hours of community service as additional conditions for his reinstatement.”

Although Nick Chubb ran the ball excellently for UGA since Gurley’s suspension, there will be even more pressure for the freshman to perform – especially against an excellent defense in Florida and against a Kentucky team – on the road – who has beaten South Carolina and given Mississippi State everything it can handle.

The NCAA said that it considered banning Gurley for longer because “the violations occurred over multiple years with multiple individuals and the student received extensive rules education about the prohibition of receiving payment for autographs.” But it added that Georgia’s “due diligence in its investigation and the student’s full disclosure of his involvement in the violations” meant that it didn’t have to come down to it.

Georgia said that it will appeal the decision, which will be reviewed this week. Saturday Down South, the SEC blog, noted that the Appeal board cannot increase the ban – which might serve Gurley bearing in mind the nature of his ‘sins’.



Mississippi State No.1 in first College Football Play-Off Poll

Unbeaten Mississippi State is No.1 in the inaugural College Football Play-Off Poll in a SEC West-owned Top 4. Despite struggling against Kentucky on Saturday, the Committee obviously felt that the away victory at LSU – who upset Ole Miss on Saturday – and the win over Auburn stood high.

Florida State – also unbeaten – is No.2, with its biggest victory over previously-unbeaten Notre Dame.

Auburn – who has only lost to Mississippi State on the road – is No. 3.

Ole Miss – who fell to LSU on Saturday in an unimpressive offensive performance – is No.4.

Oregon and Alabama round out the Top 6.

Mississippi State stands pat at No.1, Auburn rises: Post-Week 9 SEC Power Rankings

Some nights are built for Death Valley. Last Saturday was one of those nights. With Les Miles mourning the death of his mother, LSU fans took their coach on their back and beat No.3 Ole Miss 10-7 to take home a stunning victory. Of course, the win was sealed with a Bo Wallace screw-up, but we still think that’s because Les Miles’ deal with The Devil comes with making the QB doing stupid things. You know, unless you’re Dak Prescott.

Apart from that, the pre-game arrogance of Vegas and Auburn fans that they’d torch through South Carolina didn’t come off as they were fought to the bone by the Gamecocks. Eventually War Eagle came through victorious, but they should certainly be worried for the future. Tennessee fans yelled at Lane Kiffin a lot, and Lane Kiffin and his bestie Nick smashed their hopes with a convincing away win. Oh, and Missouri won at Vanderbilt.


1) Mississippi State (7-0, 4-0)

Beat Kentucky. It wasn’t beautiful, but a win was a win was a win.

2) Auburn (6-1, 3-1)

Beat South Carolina 42-35 in an exciting shoot-out, proving once again that cure for a lousy D is a good ‘O’ here in the SEC.

3) Ole Miss (7-1, 4-1)

Good Bo? Bad Bo? DEAR GOD BO WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? What we will also say is that Ole Miss’ Offense really isn’t great. We knew this, and just wanted to repeat it.

4) Alabama (7-1, 4-1)

Alabama’s offense sure has proved itself against shitty defenses in the last weeks, hasn’t it?

5) Georgia (6-1, 4-1)

No, Todd Gurley hasn’t been ‘released’ yet.

6) LSU (7-2, 3-2)

Les. Freaking. Miles. Particularly the day after your mother goes to heaven. It wasn’t pretty, but LSU’s defense choked Ole Miss and Bo Wallace. And Anthony Jennings? He might be a crappy QB, but he’s 2-for-2 in game-winning drives. And the RBs aren’t bad either. That win was for you, Cat In The Hat.

7)  Texas A&M (5-3, 2-3)

Fire Mark Snyder.

8) Arkansas (4-4, 3-2) 

Win against UAB made Hogs fans happier. And that’s a good thing.

9) Kentucky (5-3, 2-3) 

Played really well at home to MSU, but couldn’t pull it off. But things are back in the right direction for Mark Stoops. Commonwealth Stadium is a crazy place to play in once again.

10) Missouri (6-2, 3-1)

They won against Vandy, answering NO questions whatsoever. Vandy’s a bad football team.

11) South Carolina (4-4, 2-4)

South Carolina had a hot offense and 3 touchdown leads until the fourth quarter. And then it stopped being hot. Should Spurrier start thinking about replacing his own DC? Yes.

12)Florida (2-3, 3-3) 

Bad O struggled against Bye Week. Driskel Out!!

13) Tennessee (3-5, 0-4)

Young, young, young.

14) Vanderbilt (2-6, 0-5)

Bad, bad, bad.

Can LSU upset Ole Miss in Death Valley? Will South Carolina beat Auburn on the road? Week 10 SEC Preview

It’s unlikely that the fans in Death Valley are going to care that this is not a vintage week for SEC – or indeed college football fans. 

In the SEC, College Gameday’s going to be a visitor to Baton Rouge for the first time since THAT LSU vs Alabama game in 2012 (we were also there), where LSU will take on No.3-ranked Ole Miss. South Carolina takes on Auburn to try for its first de-feathering of War Eagle since 1933 (yeah, you read that right!), and Alabama goes to Tennessee, which will only be interesting if you’re either an Alabama fan or you loathe Lane Kiffin (OK, so this might be ratings-beater!). No.1 Mississippi State travels to Kentucky, Missouri plays Vanderbilt, and UAB travels to an Arkansas team that’s trying to prove that it’s actually decent.

So here we go….

No.3 OLE MISS (7-0, 4-0) AT NO.24 LSU (6-2, 2-2)

This game’s going to be interesting for a few reasons: Firstly, Ole Miss is the No.3-ranked team in the country. Death Valley is suddenly home of  an underdog (a rarity for LSU), and the bourbon-fuelled masses are going to screaming for blood. And it’s at night. Secondly, it’s a case of LSU’s young offensive talent (apart from QB, which sucks) against the very talented Ole Miss defense, which has been ripping offensive lines apart lately. We love you, Robert Nkemdiche. Thirdly, there’s the Ole Miss offense, which has hardly been great over the season (30th in total, with the biggest points total coming about Lousiana-Lafayette and miserable Vandy), although Bo Wallace hasn’t made a lot of bad mistakes. You know – in direct contrast to Anthony Jennings, LSU’s quarterback. This game is also going to mark the second time LSU RB star Leonard Fournette has faced a big-time defense. The first time against Mississippi State, he had 99 total yards.

PREDICTION: Ole Miss went into the tinnitus-causing Kyle Field and silenced Texas A&M, and so won’t be scared to go into LSU…especially against the Tigers’ young defense. Ole Miss is a 3-1/2 point favourite, and we think they’ll win by 10 in a pretty good game. 

SOUTH CAROLINA (4-3, 2-3) AT NO.5 AUBURN (5-1, 2-1)

The last time South Carolina played Auburn, they lost to the Tigers 16-13 in a game that featured 8 turnovers (4 each, 6 of them interceptions), and one Stephen Garcia. Anyway, Steve Spurrier’s 0-5 in his time at Columbia (10-8 overall), and will be begging his side to bring their ‘A’ game, which they haven’t done almost all season long. If Carolina had brought their ‘A’ game throughout the whole of the year, this might be a Top 10 clash that would have had all of us drooling. However, it’s not. When they can’t play offense, they can’t play defense. They’ve lost to Kentucky, a now-bad-looking Texas A&M team, and Missouri. Sure, Kentucky was by a touchdown and they shouldn’t have lost to Missouri, but they lost all the same. Auburn, on the other hand, is very much in the hunt to be in the Play-Off Four after only losing one game at MSU this season. The Tigers are talented they can kill you on the ground and through the air, and they can score as quickly as Oregon or Baylor. The Gamecocks will learn unless they play some mistake-less, clock-consuming football if they have a prayer in Jordan-Hare. Auburn’s favored by 17-1/2, by the way.

PREDICTION: Spurrier throws his visor a lot. Auburn by 21.

NO. 1 MISSISSIPPI STATE (6-0, 3-0) AT KENTUCKY (5-2, 2-2)

Mississippi State’s back off a bye week, and they are refreshed and excited to be No.1 in the AP Poll. They travel to play a Kentucky team who were butt-surfed in Death Valley last Saturday night, giving up 41 points and 423 yards. It could have been 60 if LSU actually had a good quarterback. That’s how lop-sided the loss was. But really, Kentucky’s beaten expectations by winning two SEC games this season, including upsetting South Carolina. If Commonwealth Stadium’s can repeat its unexpectedly off-the-hook atmosphere for the visit of Mississippi State for the 3.30 CBS game (which it’s hosting for the first time since 2007 (thanks, SB Nation!), this game could be disconcerting for the Cowbellers. The problem for us is that we see Patrick Towles, the QB for Kentucky, making more mistakes than Dak Prescott, and Kentucky doesn’t have the talent level yet.

PREDICTION: Mississippi State’s a 13-1/2 point favorite. We say Mississippi State wins, and by 14. But it’s a really good game ’til mid-way through the fourth quarter, thanks to an unruly atmosphere.

NO.4 ALABAMA (6-1, 3-1) AT TENNESSEE (3-4, 0-3)

We’re actually only really interested in this game for the reception Lane Kiffin is going to receive from Neyland Stadium. As we tweeted, we hope that it’s as nasty and abusive as possible from Volunteers fans. It’s a night game too, which’ll mean the crowd will have had enough moonshine Lane Kiffin Hate Juice to slow down an elephant. Speaking of elephants, we don’t expect the Crimson Tide to be particularly slowed after their first quarter battle against Texas A&M (it finished a close 59-0). Sure, they haven’t travelled well this season (they lost at Ole Miss, struggled against Arkansas and struggled against West Virginia), but this Tennessee team’s really not good, particularly with that primary school-grade O-Line.

PREDICTION: Alabama – a 17-point favorite – coasts, winning by 21 in a game that’s over by half-time.

VANDERBILT (2-5, 0-4) AT MISSOURI (5-2, 2-1)

Featuring a washed-up Heisman hopeful, two goddawful offenses, one goddawful defence and……a dude named Marcus, this could be the ugliest game that’s been seen in college football all year….let alone the SEC.

PREDICTION: Missouri’s a 21-point favorite. Only one point: Their offense can’t score points. Missouri by 14 in a game where the punters kick the ball a lot, and the fans try to feign interest. 

UAB (4-3, 1-2) VS ARKANSAS (3-4, 2-2)

Expect Bret Bielema to give the ball to Jonathan Williams and Alex Collins a lot and run the ball all over UAB side that gives up 161 yards on the ground a game. That’s actually not a terrible idea against a UAB side that ranks 23rd in the nation in scoring, including putting up 34 on Mississippi State earlier in the year.

PREDICTION: Arkansas’s a 23-1/2 point favourite. We think this game’s going to be pretty interesting, with the Hogs winning by 17 in a closer-than-you-might-have-thought game.



When will Georgia get Todd Gurley back?

Every Georgia fan on Twitter seemed to erupt in celebration with the news that Georgia had applied (well, at least they had at the time of writing since it was 4 hours ago) to the NCAA to get Todd Gurley out of playing purgatory and restated to the team.

According to a release from Georgia, the University said that it “plans to file the necessary paperwork with the NCAA later today.”

Seth Emerson, a writer from the Macon Telegraph and Columbus Ledger-Enquirer wrote that theThe NCAA and UGA have been working together on Gurley’s situation, so UGA’s request seems almost assured of being approved.”

There seems to be no question that Gurley took cash. Gurley’s own statement – although probably written by the lawyer that UGA hired to ensure that their Heisman candidate would at least return before the end of the season – said: “I want to thank the University, coaches, teammates, and the Bulldog Nation for their patience and support. I take full responsibility for the mistakes I made, and I can’t thank the University, my coaches, and teammates enough for supporting me throughout this process.  I’m looking forward to getting back on the field with my teammates.” If the line talking about ‘full responsibility’ isn’t a ‘mea culpa’, we don’t know what is.

If Emerson is correct and that Georgia worked with the NCAA on this issue, then Bulldogs are going to be happy at getting their Gurley back. But when? UGA’s biggest date of the season isn’t Florida in two weeks’ time. Sure, it’ll be great to have a 3.30pm kick-off with the nonsensical rubbish of Verne and Gary telling us some hidden truths from the anus of the Aflac Trivia Duck, but we think that Florida’s offense is so goddawful that Georgia could probably scrape together 21 points and beat the Gators.

Georgia’s biggest date is with Auburn on November 15th. Sanford Stadium will be absolutely rocking to the point of explosion. We have a feeling Gurley comes back then. Two games for the NCAA doesn’t feel enough.

Alabama and Georgia make statements: SEC Week 8 Power Rankings

Both Alabama and Georgia made statements on Saturday. Alabama by shutting down Texas A&M’s offense, Georgia by going to Arkansas and picking up the Win That No-One-But-Vegas-Who-Had-Them-Favored expected, striking a monster blow for SEC East. The dumpster fire in Florida continued as they lost 42-12 to Missouri at home on Homecoming Night, while Ole Miss shut down Tennessee at home.

Anyway, here are your SEC rankings:


It’s rare for us to keep a team at No.1 despite only playing Bye Week, but there we go. We saw Ole Miss’ performance, and while we love their defense, we’d still take MSU in The Egg Bowl. Right now.


Ole Miss’ defense by damn!! Another rock of a performance against Tennessee, for whom their punter was the busiest player of the game (that and their QBs picking themselves off the turf). As predicted, Ole Miss’ D-Line ate Tennessee’s young O-Line alive. And with Bo Wallace doing just what he needed to do (ie be accurate and not cause turnovers), Ole Miss won comfortably in front of a happy, suddenly expectant Rebel crowd.


Alabama effectively had a bye week this week by playing Texas A&M’s defense, which didn’t bother to tackle anyone all game long. 59-0 could well have been 80-0 if Alabama had kept the heat up instead of being a little more conservative in the second half.


Stayed on bye week, flapping their wings happily. And yes, this is still a very good Auburn team. But the Ole Miss, Georgia and Alabama games still loom large on War Eagle’s schedule. We can’t wait.


Nick Chubb. Nick. Freaking. Chubb. Another storming performance by the freshman wonder and another solid first half performance by Georgia’s defense effectively put the game out to reach in the first half, but UGA’s second half (and in particular the third quarter) – where they seemed to completely relax and Mike Bobo’s offense looked hell-bent on being conservative – will be a worry for UGA fans, but this team is flying right now.


6) LSU

With a bunch of people thinking LSU would get upset at home to Kentucky, LSU turned it on on Saturday night, giving the ball to Terrence Magee, who had 127 yards and 2 TDs in the Tigers’ 41-3 mauling of the ‘Cats. If we’re honest, the best line of the night was Brent Musberger’s: “Death Valley at night folks, when every Saturday night in Hallowe’en”. He’s obviously seen some of the tailgating that goes on.


Such is the tire fire known as A&M defense right now – they’ve lost heavily in three straight games – I’m not sure that the Aggies won’t lose to LSU at the start of the season. Seriously, defensive co-ordinator Mark Snyder needs to go. And a word for Kevin Sumlin: You might well blame the players for their lack of effort in their shellacking by Alabama, but they needed a motivator. And you weren’t it.


Arkansas was pretty great in the second half against Georgia, but by then they’d committed enough errors to put them into a hole that they really weren’t going to get out – especially with Brandon Allen as the QB and a wide receiving corps that’s young. There’s a lot to like about this Razorbacks team, but it’s going to take time.


The defense? Two thumbs up? The offense? Two thumbs down. Maty Mauk (You remember him? You know, the guy who people were talking about as a possible Heisman hopeful?) had TWENTY yards passing, no TDs and one INT on an offense that created just one rushing touchdown and 119 total yards of offense. The D? Oh, it ‘only’ caused 6 turnovers, and special teams had 2 touchdowns (Marcus Murphy took a kick off and a punt return to the house).


Whooped at LSU, which was a timely reminder that maybe South Carolina wasn’t all that good, and maybe they were a little overrated.


Carolina got a morale-boosting win against Furman, and that’s about all it was. A morale-booster. The attendance was pitiful, and so was the game.


Fired Will Muschamp yet? There are problems all over the Gators, from heads to tail. Nothing is going right for the coach, who some UGA fans are already calling “Agent Muschamp”. We laughed. Well, at least it’ll make The Cocktail Party interesting, when all anyone will talk about is his job, and maybe Todd Gurley.


A young O-Line was eaten alive by Ole Miss on Saturday night. When they DID get a bit of room, Justin Worley hardly helped his tall, talented wide receivers by throwing every ball too high. The defense did a pretty good job in the first half, but looked exhausted from living on the field. The loss wasn’t a surprise, and the bad news for the Vols is that they host Alabama next.


Yeah, so anyway….





LSU and Texas schedule each other for home-and-home

Praise The Lord of beautiful co-eds in burnt orange, white shorts and cowboy boots! Praise The Lord of purple, bourbon, and great food! Praise Him! Praise Him indeed!

OK, now we’ve stopped saying praise, we can open our eyes and say that according to reports, LSU and Texas have schedule a home-and-home starting 2019. Sure, that’s 5 full seasons away (giving both sides good time to cancel), but right now, we’re pretty excited.

The games will be played in Austin on September 7th 2019, and in Baton Rouge in 2020. This is going to be a very, very expensive ticket, with Texas fans wanting to party their ass off in New Orleans, and LSU fans wanting to do the same in Austin before the game. These games should have been scheduled on Labor Day Weekend. Oh…wait a minute….that would be bad for the liver.

According to a report, LSU has also added Miami to the dreaded neutral site venue schedule at JerryWorld. It’ll be in 2018. Yay.

Can Arkansas upset Georgia? Can Texas A&M stun Alabama? Week 8 SEC preview

“If you ask the church then I am no believer
Spend Sundays asleep I’m just another dreamer
Still tryna find my home sweet home, oh I, oh I, oh I
And I guess I ain’t too good for money neither” — Rudimental (Feat. Emeil Sande)

If the church is the fans of Alabama, then a lot of people left the bandwagon after an inept victory at Arkansas. And Arkansas’ still dreaming of finding a win – and Fayetteville may have been noisy on Saturday night, but they couldn’t find the victory. Elsewhere, Mississippi State have their home sweet home after beating Auburn in One Of The Ugliest Games You’ll See This Year (Feat. Bad Fundamentals and Tons of Turnovers), and Georgia fans didn’t mind so much about the money that Todd Gurley may/may not have taken when Nick Chubb took the shoulders of the Bulldogs on his wide shoulders in a shut-out win over Missouri, for whom all the money that I may have spent on a bet with my buddy on Maty Mauk winning a Heisman looks a terrible one.

Anyway, now I’ve stopped with the lyric-SEC-show (I could go on for hours), here’s your SEC preview. No Mississippi State this week (they play Bye Week in a thriller), but there is still plenty of love to be found….

GEORGIA (5-1, 3-1) AT ARKANSAS (3-3, 0-3)

I’ve made a crapload of sarcastic comments about Arkansas in the past, but there is no way in hell that this team should having a losing record in the SEC, let alone be 0-3. They should 2-1, and be coming off magical victories against Texas A&M and Alabama…because they out-played both teams and came up with nothing. And funnily enough, they killed THEMSELVES in both games, especially on special teams. Georgia, on the other hand, is STILL waiting to find out about what’s going to happen with Todd Gurley. According to Mark Richt, it’s going to be known by Friday. So chill out and stop threatening to burn the whole of the NCAA down, Georgia fans. But Gurley aside, Georgia shocked the hell out of me by playing one of the most complete games from a Bulldogs team I’ve seen in SEC for an age. They went to Missouri and throttled them. Their pass rush was excellent, their secondary had four INTs, and the offense was nice and mixed, which is a change bearing in mind that usually Dawgs’ fans want to throttle Mike Bobo. Anyway, they walk into an Arkansas house where the fans are fed up of God ****ing them about. They should be worried.

PREDICTION: UGA’s a 3-1/2 point favorite in this one. We believe more in Arkansas that we do the ‘Dawgs. Sorry, Coach Richt. Razorbacks by 7. HAVE A DRINK EVERY TIME: They mention Todd Gurley. Then pass out at half-time.

TEXAS A&M (5-2, 2-2) AT ALABAMA (5-1, 2-1)

“How about THAT?” You remember this game two years’ ago, right? You remember? The game where Johnny Football had the jaws dropping as he escaped the clutches of Alabama defenders and passed for touchdowns and touched the fingers of The Almighty in the process (while making Alabama haters laugh their asses off in the process), and took A&M to a stunning victory at Alabama? Anyway, this game, featuring no Johnny Manziel and a Texas A&M side that’s been downtrodden in its last two games, and an Alabama side where the fans seem to HATE what’s happening up at Tuscaloosa after the loss to Ole Miss and the 14-13 win at Arkansas (“IT’S FREAKING ARKANSAS!!”, scream the critics – who probably haven’t seen how good Arky’s been this year), is live on your TV screens at 3.30. So we’ve got more Uncle Verne and Aunt Daniel, both with punchability. Speaking of punchability, expect more verbal punches in the face from Nick Saban in the direction of fans, coaches and players if Alabama doesn’t play well for the third straight week. And A&M? They could do with a defense, a good performance from QB Kenny Hill, and their wide receivers actually catching some balls on a pretty weak Alabama secondary. If Alabama plays badly, the CBS guys can always blame illicit substances, which, God forbid, we never did in college.

PREDICTION: Alabama’s a 13-point favorite. Alabama starts slow, but wins by 14 in the end in a game that’s actually pretty entertaining. EVERYBODY OWES YOU DRINKS IF: Verne & Gary mention ‘off-field distraction’ AND mention the tight end who got caught with a lot of weed in his dorm room. No points for just ‘off-field distraction’. 

TENNESSEE (3-3, 0-2) AT OLE MISS (6-0, 3-0)

Ole Miss’ ‘D’ were like foxes at a henhouse on Saturday – albeit a very loud one- eating Texas A&M’s offense alive in a tremendous performance at Kyle Field. It was meant to be close, but it wasn’t. It was the sort of performance that both sets of fans will look back and say: “Wow. That Ole Miss’ is pretty freakin’ good”. Bo Wallace wasn’t ‘Tortured Bo’, and Robert Ndkemiche absolutely smoked (SMOKE WEED?! GEDDIT?!) Texas A&M’s offensive line. Oh, and as for Tennessee? We played absolutely no attention to Tennessee’s powerhouse over Chat-Town, because that’s how it was meant to be…but we know one thing, the young offensive line better be worried about Ole Miss’ D-Line. If they don’t do a good job, Justin Worley’s going to be part of the after-game steak at The Grove.

PREDICTION: Ole Miss wins by 21 on that defense. HAVE A DRINK IF: Everyone drones on and on about the Alabama game, and adds in about The Grove and The Party That Saw The Goalposts Removed And Taken Around Town.

MISSOURI (4-2, 1-1) AT FLORIDA (3-2, 2-2) 

Positive Spin for the Gators: Florida had a hell of a tussle with LSU, and really should have beaten the Tigers. Negative spin: Jeff Driskel was the UF quarterback, and Les Miles and the voodoo gods he prays to were against them. Negative Spin for Missouri: They were shut out at home by Georgia, and looked awful. Positive spin for Missouri: It can’t get any worse, can it?

PREDICTION: This one’s going to be ugly. Florida’s a 6-1/2 point favorite in this one. We’ll take the Gators by 10, in a game that might end 10-0. HAVE A DRINK IF: If Jeff Driskel throws for a touchdown. 

KENTUCKY (5-1, 2-1) AT LSU (5-2, 1-2)

Who would have bet that at Week 8, Kentucky would have a better overall and SEC record than LSU? Anyone? Certainly not me. Anyway, Kentucky comes off a pretty easy win, while LSU won via an INSANE catch by Travin Dural. Brent Musberger sounded pretty happy to commentate on it. Gosh, I miss Brent Musberger. He’s so much better than Chris Fowler on Saturday nights. Anyway, his trip to Death Valley for UK vs LSU can only mean one thing: His career must be falling, and falling fast. The powers-that-be at ESPN didn’t think he was worth the biggest non-CBS SEC game of the week in Fayetteville or even the Ole Miss game. Anyway, we’re rabbiting on about Musberger because we’re not all that excited about Kentucky vs LSU. Actually, that’s not true. We’re pretty excited about seeing a UK side that gave Florida everything it could handle in The Swamp, and upset South Carolina. We’re excited to see how the offense will cope with a LSU side that’s suddenly found a bit of joy after their own Swamp-survival. This could be fun.

PREDICTION: LSU ‘s a 10-point favorite. We’re going with Kentucky in a stunning upset. Death Valley burns. HAVE A DRINK IF: Anthony Jennings doesn’t do something awful for 2 drives. If you had to drink every time he did something awful, you’d be in hospital and blaming us.

We’re not commenting on Furman (2-4, 1-2) ‘s visit to South Carolina (3-3, 2-2), although we know Spurrier will probably say something nice about ’em and then demolish them. HAVE A DRINK IF: Spurrier’s visor comes off in frustration.





Something stinks, and it’s called the 2015 SEC Non-Conference Schedule

Something stinks, and it’s called the SEC’s 2015 non-conference schedule.

Listen, we know that you in South Carolina will scream: “Hell, well at least WE’RE scheduling Clemson!” and those in Florida will say: “Screw You! We’re playing FSU!” and you would be right. I would ask you to imagine what would happen if both schools decided NOT to play that schedule. South Carolina, for example, would burn, with both ADs crucified on Hilton Head Island. In Florida, the feeling would probably be the same, since the two sides have been playing since 1958. And maybe Georgia fans will say: “Yeah! And we play Georgia Tech!”. Georgia fans, a rivalry named: “Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate” is probably one of best rivalry names in the history of rivalry names, and Georgia fans LOVE playing this game. Why? Georgia has pretty much owned Georgia Tech since the turn of the millennium (13-1).

But apart from these three rivalries, we only have ONE home-and-home, and that’s the completion of Oklahoma’s visit to Tennessee – in an atmosphere which we expect to be off-the-hook, with the Vols a year older and a year much-improved, buoyed by their SEC victory over Vanderbilt in 2014 (we’re projecting, but still).

Still we hate the fact that South Carolina’s opening up its 2015 season away from the friendly confines of Williams-Brice. It’s something that always tells us that it’s Christmas when the lights are on on a Thursday night in Columbia (and yes, A&M fans, I am aware what happened last time!!!)

What kills me, as usual, is the SEC vs Power 5 Conference games are not home-and-homes, if you ignore Georgia, Florida and South Carolina for a second. There are NOT home-and-homes. They are merely vehicles to get schools and certain NFL owners a ton of cash, and leave season ticket holders absolutely screwed.

If I was an Alabama season ticket holder, I’d be PISSED if I had to go to JerryWorld instead of Tuscaloosa to watch the Wisconsin game. We would have loved Alabama to visit Wisconsin at Camp Randall, too. The atmosphere would have been off-the-hook.


1) Clemson vs South Carolina

2) Florida State at Florida

3) Oklahoma at Tennessee

4) Alabama vs Wisconsin (JerryWorld)

5) South Carolina vs UNC (Charlotte)

6) Texas A&M vs Arizona State (Houston)

7) Georgia vs Georgia Tech

8) LSU at Syracuse

9) Louisville at Kentucky

10) Auburn vs Louisville (Atlanta)

The rest of them suck.

Here is each team’s 2015 SEC Non-Conference Match-Ups (Thanks Mr SEC for putting in the hard work on this – mine was just a copy/paste job).


Wisconsin (Dallas), MTSU, UL-Monroe, Charleston Southern


Texas Tech, UTEP, Toledo, UT-Martin


Louisville (Atlanta), Jacksonville State, San Jose State, Idaho 


New Mexico State, East Carolina, Florida Atlantic, Florida State


UL-Monroe, Southern, Georgia Southern, at Georgia Tech


UL-Lafayette, Eastern Kentucky, Charlotte, Louisville


McNeese State, at Syracuse, Eastern Michigan, Western Kentucky

Mississippi State

at Southern Miss, Northwestern State, Troy, Louisiana Tech


Southeast Missouri State, at Arkansas State, UConn, TBC

Ole Miss

UT-Martin, Fresno State, New Mexico State, at Memphis

South Caroilna

North Carolina (Charlotte), UCF, The Citadel, Clemson


UAB (Nashville), Oklahoma, Western Carolina, North Texas

 Texas A&M

Arizona State (Houston), Ball State, Nevada, Western Carolina


Western Kentucky, Austin Peay, at MTSU, at Houston


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